Talk:Jonathan Brookins/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 03:46, 4 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I read the article over a couple time, and here are the issues I have:

Fights in background need cites.
"Brookins then signed with the Ultimate Fighting Championship" when? Dates aren't really used in the article yet they would be quite helpful.
"Brookins then got hooks in " huh?
"In a somewhat lopsided bout, Brookins controlled;" comma rather than semicolon
First paragraph of UFC needs cite, as does first paragraph of legal troubles.
There's just not enough tangible info in the article as is. Right now, you wouldn't have guessed he's had 15 fights. Namely, there's no personal life info at all.
The language gets a bit repetitive in areas. For example, you use Brookins rather frequently where there are instances where you can just use he.

I would normally put this on hold, but I think this is a situation where you would need more than a week to make all the changes. As a result, I'll fail the article as is. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 03:46, 4 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]