Talk:John Toshack/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 20:06, 2 May 2018 (UTC)

Going to review this article. MWright96 (talk) 20:06, 2 May 2018 (UTC)

1. It is reasonably well written.

   a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):

2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.

   a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):

3. It is broad in its coverage.

   a (major aspects): b (focused):

4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.

   Fair representation without bias:

5. It is stable.

   No edit wars, etc.:

6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.

   a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

7. Overall:

   Pass/Fail:

Lead

• "During his career, he scored over 150 goals in the Football League in over 350 appearances " - more than to avoid reptition of "over" - Done
• Wikilink La Liga and player-manager - Done
• "he returned to Real Madrid for a second time but was fired" - sacked - Done

Cardiff City

• "the Cardiff City board stated that they had left the decision up to the player who made the decision to move clubs." - who chose to switch clubs. - Done

Liverpool

• "He made his debut 3 days later " - three - Done
• "but his noted aerial ability proved to be a key asset in Liverpool's style of play as helped" - as it helped - Done
• "at the age of 25, Toshack was told by specialist doctors after failing the medical" - reptition of medical - Done
• "He was voted in at No.34 on the Liverpool website poll 100 Players Who Shook The Kop, in which thousands of fans worldwide voted for their top 100 Liverpool players." - this sentenced needs to be referenced - Done

Swansea City

• Link player-manager - Done
• Heart-attack should not have the hyphen - Done
• "Toshack led the Swans" & "Once they reached the top flight, the Swans" - no nicknames of Swansea City please - Done
• "the Swans were predicted by many to go straight back down" - to get relegated - Done
• "leading the division with only three months left of the season" - remove the text emboldened as we've already established this is the season we're talking about - Done
• "before finishing their first season in the top flight" - campaign - Done
• "The heavy spending during Toshack's years at the club were often " - Swansea - Done

European management

• Wikilink La Liga - Done
• "and a runners-up pot in the league in 1988." - were the league runners-up - Done
• "led to him being fired by the club " - sacked - Done

Wales national football team

• "He stated his intention that Sociedad would remain his first priority if any other international fixtures" - change to matches again to avoid repetition - Done
• Football Association of Wales should have its acronyms in brackets - Done

Besiktas and return to Real Madrid

• You don't need Bobby Robson linked since you've already linked him in the prior sub-section - Done
• "With the club in sixth position on is arrival" - his - Done
• "and Italian side Catania" - team - Done

Wales (second spell)

• "In November 2004, Toshack was appointed as manager of the Wales national team for the second time after being named as the "unanimous" choice of the FAW after being named in a three man shortlist for the role alongside Philippe Troussier and former Welsh international player Dean Saunders." - try In November 2004, Toshack was appointed the Wales national team manager after being named as the "unanimous" choice of the FAW. He was named in a three-man shortlist alongside retired defender Philippe Troussier and former Welsh international player Dean Saunders. - Done, although I've used Frenchman instead of retired defender for Troussier as I believe it's a bit more relevant to the context.
• "with the match at 0–0 that allowed Austria into the match to score two late goals" - contention and conceded two late goals - Done

Khazar Lankaran

• "and competing in the Relegation group" - decaptalise the first letter in "Relegation" - Done
• "Khazar Lankaran ended the season in 8th position, with a league record under Toshack of played 9, won 3, drawn 3, lost 3. " - try Khazar Lankaran ended the season in eighth position, with a league record under Toshack of three games out of nine won, with an equal number of three matches drawn or lost. - Done
• "leaving Khazar in 8th place in the league." - eighth - Done

Personal life

• "at the age of 20 at St. John church in Canton." - St John's Church in Canton - Done
• "After 43 years of marriage, the pair divorced in 2012." - what was the reason for the divorce? - Done

References

• Add the page number which supports the material cited by References 8, 19 & 39 if possible Unfortunately, Google Books doesn't seem to list page numbers in these limited previews.
• The newspaper for Reference 24 should be Liverpool Echo and David Prentice needs to be moved to the author section - Done
• References 25 and 77 are missing their access dates - Done
• Reference 80 is lacking the author and the date it was published - Done
• Reference 82 is an interlink page from Wikipedia which is prohibited per WP:UGC - Done

I shall be putting this review on hold so that the nominator can make the necessary alterations where possible. MWright96 (talk) 14:04, 4 May 2018 (UTC)

Thanks very much for the review, I've made a start on fixing the issues raised. Kosack (talk) 16:34, 4 May 2018 (UTC)

@MWright96: I think I've addressed all of the issues above, let me know what you think. Kosack (talk) 06:12, 5 May 2018 (UTC)

@Kosack: Changes look all good. Now promoting to GA class. MWright96 (talk) 07:15, 5 May 2018 (UTC)