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Talk:Job for a Cowboy/GA1

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GA Review

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GA review (see here for criteria)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS):
    The first sentence in the lead was a little confusing to read at first. Perhaps it can be changes to "Job for a Cowboy is an American death metal band that formed in Glendale, Arizona in December 2003." Under 'Formation and Doom (2003–2006)', first paragraph, the sentence that begins with "In 2004, they set up a MySpace page…" all the way to the end of that paragraph needs a good copy-edit; for the most part, those sentences were copied word by word. Part of the second paragraph follows the same pattern. Under 'Genesis (2007–present)', the sentence "In March 2007, Job for a Cowboy completed work on their full-length debut, entitled Genesis" reads a little odd. Perhaps it can be changed to "In March 2007, Job for a Cowboy completed their full-length debut album, Genesis."
     Doing... Cannibaloki 20:35, 2 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    I completely forgot this, but the lead does not comply with WP:LEAD. DiverseMentality 01:17, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
     Done I changed the sentences, removed the {{Fact}} tag, and updated the lead. Cannibaloki 03:22, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    The articles says the band was formed in 2003, but the source to Allmusic says it was formed in 2002. Just for clarification, which is it? Under 'Genesis (2007–present)', there's a {{fact}} tag. That information has to be cited or removed.
    I'm not using the source of Allmusic. Metal Blade Records says that the band was formed in December 2003. Maybe Allmusic writer has commited an error. Just for clarification, I'm using the source of Metal Blade. Cannibaloki 20:35, 2 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
    I am placing the article on hold for seven days to allow for the above concerns to be addressed. DiverseMentality 19:38, 2 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    I'm still not too sure with the article. I'm going to have to ask for a second opinion. DiverseMentality 08:10, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Hi. I did a minor copy-edit on the article. For me the article still has some fairly obvious 1a issues. I'd also like to see more idea about why people keep leaving the band. I don't think saying that "---- left the band", without providing rationale is acceptable for a Wikipedia GA. Apart from that, I can't see any major issues. Does that held, DiverseMentality? Apterygial talkstalkinsane idea 08:30, 3 December 2008 (UTC) Actually, the lead could be a little longer. Apterygial talkstalkinsane idea 08:34, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Yes, that was my concern with the lead; it seems a bit short, even for the a short article like this one. I hadn't thought about reasons of why members of the band were leaving, that would help the article as well. DiverseMentality 16:36, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
If you want to expand the lead, add some stuff from the "Formation and Doom (2003–2006)" section. The lead has basically nothing from that at the moment. I think it would also held if you could give a brief description of their sound (influences, etc.) That should then be mentioned in the body in addition. That should get the lead to a decent length. Apterygial talkstalkinsane idea 23:42, 3 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
This properly expanded, now I will ask someone to make a copy-edit. Cannibaloki 01:11, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I don't mean to butt in on the GA review, DM, but I'm interested in why Doom is referred to as and EP in the main body, but an album in the lead. This needs to be consistent. I think it's probably an EP. Apterygial talkstalkinsane idea 02:00, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

No worries, Apterygial. Everything seems to be looking good, except for the last sentence under 'Genesis (2007–present)'. Has the tour began yet? It's pretty ambiguous. DiverseMentality 04:18, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I didn't understand. Following the release of Genesis, they began the tour. Cannibaloki 04:41, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I was referring to this sentence: "Job for a Cowboy will embark on a U.S. headlining tour in November and December 2008, with support acts Hate Eternal, and All Shall Perish." DiverseMentality 04:45, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

I would like to remove it, because it is not a great tour and I don't have updated information about. Cannibaloki 05:02, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
It's fine. I updated it. Apterygial talkstalkinsane idea 05:06, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

All concerns have been addressed, I'm passing the article. Good work! DiverseMentality 18:51, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks, DiverseMentality and Apterygial. =) Cannibaloki 19:57, 4 December 2008 (UTC)[reply]
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