Talk:Jerry Rice/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 02:52, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 02:52, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Images are appropriately licensed. Footnote numbers refer to this version. Earwig shows no issues beyond unavoidable short strings of words.

FN 54 cites the New York Post, which is an unreliable source per WP:RS/PS. The fact you're using it to cite is probably OK, but if it's possible to remove the source in favour of more reliable sources I would suggest doing so.
- The article in question is published by the New York Post, but is written by an editorial board of the Associated Press. Moreover, there is consensus on the Posts' unreliability on the reporting of politics and controversial topics, but as far as I can tell, there's no consensus on its reliability on uncontroversial topics such as sports. Open to more discussion on this, though. NSNW (talk) 17:04, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  Yes, I think it's OK for this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
What makes the following reliable sources?
- d3football.com -- and if you keep it the formatting of the citation should be fixed; it currently uses cite journal.
  - I'm unable to find this anywhere in the references. Weird.
    It's FN 45: "An open letter to Jerry Rice". Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
    - It's the official website related to NCAA Division III football, the division in which Rice spent his college seasons. I've changed the format to a website as well. NSNW (talk) 21:49, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
- bluephi.net -- which you have listed as bluephi.com in the citation, so that should be fixed if you keep this.
  - Fixed.
    The citation is fixed, but why is it reliable? Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  Changed it to a more reliable source. NSNW (talk) 22:22, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
- ~~spotrac.com -- looks like a two-person operation; is this treated as reliable by other reliable sources such as newspapers?~~
  - Here's [article] from Bleacher Report using its statistics as a reference. It's a post-2013 article, generally considered more reliable than articles before that. I thought about using a different player salary source: over-the-cap.com, but I found it harder to source.
~~The career statistics section appears to be sourced by an embedded external link at the foot of the table; can you change this to a citation format?~~
- Fixed.
  That works. See this for another way; up to you. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
The "Awards and honors" section is unsourced.
- All of the information in the section is sourced in other parts of the article.
  I think we still need something; a reader shouldn't have to search through the article to find the sourcing for each row, and if an editor were to remove the earlier sourcing the list entry would become unsourced with no warning. A ref column is a common way to do it; e.g. this approach. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
I see what you mean. Most of the awards can be sourced under Rice's PFR stat page, I'll source them there. NSNW (talk) 21:57, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
"After recovering from a knee injury and his play regressing, San Francisco traded him to the Raiders in 2001, having good seasons with the team and helping to lead them to an appearance in Super Bowl XXXVII, where they were defeated by the Tampa Bay Buccaneers, affecting Rice's previously unblemished Super Bowl record." There's no subject for "having good seasons" and this is too long and complicated a sentence anyway. Can we break it up?
- Reworded. NSNW (talk) 17:09, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
"The Raiders traded him to the Seahawks midway through the 2004 season, where he finished his final season. He briefly signed with the Broncos, retiring shortly before the start of the 2005 season.": repetitious.
- Reworded and removed the second mention of 'season'.
  I tweaked this a bit. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
"Rice is the career leader in most major statistical categories for wide receivers,[11] including receptions, receiving touchdowns, receiving yards, scrimmage yards, and total touchdowns; holding the postseason records for these statistics; he once held the single season records for yards and touchdowns."
- Did you forgot to add feedback to this? I'm unsure of what you want me to fix with that sentence. NSNW (talk) 17:13, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  I think I was going to complain about the semicolons but then just put a general comment about them in the next bullet instead. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
"Rice's father, Joe, was a brick mason who built houses by hand; while holding other jobs to provide for the family": this is not what semicolons are for; should be a comma. Semicolons separate complete sentences. Please review the article for semicolons; I see other examples further down. I just did a Ctrl-F to find semicolons in the article and there are 69 -- of the first half-dozen I checked all but one should have been a comma.
- Fixed the semicolon you mentioned. I'll continue to weed through the rest of the article for any unneeded ones. NSNW (talk) 17:20, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  OK; will hold off on reviewing the semicolons again till you tell me you're done. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:19, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
  Finished cutting some of them. I believe there are 28 now. NSNW (talk) 16:30, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]
~~"Rice signed a five-year, $5.05 contract": somehow I suspect this amount is wrong.~~
- Oh typos. Yes, he was definetely paid $5.05 over five years, great riches for most of us. Fixed.
~~"he believed he would help in the 49ers' pursuit of the Super Bowl": Rice believed Sanders would help, or Rice believed Rice would help?~~
- Didn't want to be too repeat 'Sanders' too much, but I can understand the problem. Fixed. NSNW (talk) 17:11, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

That's everything. I made quite a few minor copyedits. You might consider getting a GOCE copyedit done before you nominate another article; if there are too many prose problems you may find your nominations get failed. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 13:42, 5 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I believe I addressed all of your concerns. NSNW (talk) 17:08, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The semicolons are much improved; thanks -- I would still disagree on some but that's not an issue for GA. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 17:45, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Earwig finds no issues. Spotchecks:

FN 32 cites "In 1982, Rice played his first season with freshman quarterback Willie Totten." Verified.
FN 63 cites "Before the 1988 season, Rice signed a five-year, $5.05m contract in June that kept him with the 49ers through 1992." Verified.
FN 143 cites "With injury concerns with Rich Gannon, he asked Raiders owner Al Davis to trade him": Verified, but I don't think the source really connects these two things the way this sentence does. The source's description of Rice's frustration has nothing to do with Gannon.
FN 167 cites "On September 20, 2010, during halftime of a game against the Saints, the 49ers retired Rice's No. 80 jersey" - verified.

Can you tweak the sentence about him and Gannon? I think just dropping the mention of Gannon would do it. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 17:45, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

I removed the mention of Gannon. NSNW (talk) 18:01, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good; passing. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 18:01, 10 September 2022 (UTC)[reply]