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Talk:Japanese aircraft carrier Ryūjō/GA1

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GA Review

[edit]

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Anotherclown (talk · contribs) 00:38, 15 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Progression

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  • Version of the article when originally reviewed: [1]
  • Version of the article when review was closed: [2]

Technical review

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  • Citations: The Citation Check tool reveals no errors with reference consolidation (no action req'd).
  • Disambiguations: no dab links [3] (no action req'd).
  • Linkrot: external links check out [4] (no action req'd).
  • Alt text: Images all lack alt text so you might consider adding it [5] (not a GA req'ment - suggestion only).
  • Copyright violations: The Earwig Tool reveals no issues with copyright violations or close paraphrasing [6] (no action req'd).
  • Duplicate links: a few duplicate links:
    • funnels
    • bridge
    • flight deck
    • typhoon
    • Nakajima B5N
    • Kakuji Kakuta
    • heavy cruiser

Criteria

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  • It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS):
    • In the lead this is a little repetitive: "She proved to be top-heavy and only marginally stable and she was back in the shipyard for modifications to address those issues within a year." Specifically "she" twice in same sentence. Perhaps consider more simply: "She proved to be top-heavy and only marginally stable and was back in the shipyard for modifications to address those issues within a year."
    • Suggested rewording her: "...the Navy doubled her aircraft stowage requirement to 48 in order to give her a more useful air group...", consider instead "... the Navy doubled her aircraft stowage requirement to 48 in order to give her a more capable air group..."
    • Measurement should be hypothecated here as its an adjective per WP:MEASUREMENT, "...Her 513 ft 6 in (156.5 m) flight deck..."
    • "As completed, Ryūjō's primary AA armament...", what is AA? Abbrev needs to be introduced at first use (you link and explain the abbrev a few sentences later).
    • Adjective here too unless I'm mistaken: "...25 millimeters (0.98 in) AA guns."
    • Date format here seems off: " the ship was reconstructed from 26 May 1934 to 20 August...", consider instead: " the ship was reconstructed from 26 May to 20 August 1934..."
    • Typo here: "Captain Ichiro Ono assumed command on 15 November 1934 and Ryūjō becomes the flagship...", consider instead: "Captain Ichiro Ono assumed command on 15 November 1934 and Ryūjō became the flagship..."
    • Typo here: "The following month the ship was chosen to evaluate of dive-bombing tactics...:, consider instead: "...The following month the ship was chosen to evaluate dive-bombing tactics..."
    • This seems awkward to me: "Her aircraft complement consisted of 12 (plus four spares) A4N fighters...", consider instead: "Her aircraft complement consisted of 12 A4N fighters (plus four spares)..."
    • "Her air group is flown ashore on 6 October..." → "Her air group was flown ashore on 6 October..."
    • "Ryūjō is given a refit that lasts from December 1939 through January 1940 and becomes a training ship until November..." → "Ryūjō was given a refit that lasts from December 1939 through January 1940 and becomes a training ship until November..."
    • "The ship's air group now consists of 18 Nakajima B5N ("Kate") torpedo bombers and 16 A5M4 fighters..." → "The ship's air group then consisted of 18 Nakajima B5N ("Kate") torpedo bombers and 16 A5M4 fighters."
  • It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    • All major points cited using WP:RS.
    • No issues with OR.
  • It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
    • Most major points seem to be covered without going into undue detail.
    • Level of coverage seems appropriate.
  • It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    a (fair representation): b (all significant views):
    • No issues here.
  • It is stable.
    No edit wars etc.:
    • No issues here.
  • It contains images, where possible, to illustrate the topic.
    a (tagged and captioned): b (Is illustrated with appropriate images): c (non-free images have fair use rationales): d public domain pictures appropriately demonstrate why they are public domain:
    • Images are all PD and seem appropriate to the article.
  • Overall:
    a Pass/Fail:
Looks fine, just a few minor prose and MOS issues above to deal with. Happy to discuss anything you disagree with of course. Anotherclown (talk) 01:36, 15 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]

I've fixed everything that you've point about above. A most thorough review. Many thanks.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 03:37, 15 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Too easy. Passing now. All the best. Anotherclown (talk) 05:11, 15 September 2013 (UTC)[reply]