Talk:Jane Irwin Harrison/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: RoySmith (talk · contribs) 18:48, 4 January 2024 (UTC)[reply]

The three years in "(née Irwin; July 23, 1804 – 1845–1847)" are confusing. I see this is later explained as uncertainty in the year of death, but maybe "c. 1846" would be a better way to express that?
"From this marriage, Jane received seven more siblings". I guess that would make them half-siblings?
"She was widowed upon the death of her husband": That's an odd sentence; is there any other way to be widowed?
"it was decided that his wife Anna Harrison would not travel". Who decided that? See MOS:WEASEL.
"Jane Harrison was chosen" same as above.
"incoming president" perhaps use the more common term, "president-elect"?
"Also accompanying them", drop "also"
"Harrison had asked her aunt" there's multiple Harrisons being discussed. I think you'd do better to refer to her by her first name.
"as she had previously lived" it's not clear if "she" is referring to Jane Findlay or Jane Harrison, or maybe even Anna Harrison.
"Harrison married widower Lewis Whiteman, and she died of tuberculosis a few years later." This makes it sound as if there was some causal relationship between the marriage and the tuberculosis.
I will admit to some general concern over the length of this article, i.e. how short it is. There's nothing in WP:GACR which requires a minimum length (and thus I won't demand additional material), but it stil leaves me wondering if there's more than can or should be said.

Looking over the references, they all appear to be WP:RS
The citation for Ref 5 contains an error: "CS1 maint: date and year (link)"
Spot checking Special:Permalink/1193045011:
- Ref 1: I'm not convinced "She has sometimes been confused with her aunt, Jane Findlay," is supported by this source.
- Ref 3: The source verifies, but the citation is confusing. Why not skip the links to the Cultural Resources Geographic Information System and just cite the NRHP Inventory form directly?
- Ref 9: TIL the word "chatelaine" :-)

I didn't find any copyright problems, either from the spot-checked sources or via earwig.
Both images have appropriate licenses
No WP:OR
No problems with stability, neutrality, etc

RoySmith I believe I've addressed everything in the article. I reworded all of the items you listed under prose, and I adjusted the sources as needed. Thebiguglyalien (talk) 01:19, 5 January 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Looks good, thanks for the quick response. RoySmith (talk) 01:39, 5 January 2024 (UTC)[reply]