Talk:Italia-class ironclad/GA1
GA Review
[edit]| GA toolbox |
|---|
| Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: ErrantX (talk · contribs) 15:00, 18 November 2015 (UTC)
Seeing as I've reviewed Italia, may as well do the class too!
- Insp Eng; what does this mean?
- I'd assume Inspector Engineer, but Conway's doesn't give the full title. FWIW, Brin's bio doesn't mention the title.
- on 15,000 tons (15,237 tonnes) displacement; the armament and coal has been reduced but the displacement increases? Just checking this is correct?
- Yup - no details on why the apparent discrepancy, but I'd assume Brin wasn't planning on so large a hull to achieve the speed he wanted (which is to say, finer lines and thus a longer hull were required to reach 17+ knots, requiring more armor to protect the hull, etc.)
- en echelon; could this be linked to something?
- There is a link to en echelon in the glossary of nautical terms we have
- in vs. inch; could it be made consistent or is different in places for a reason?
- I usually like to spell out a unit the first time its used - it might not be all that worthwhile, since inch is a common unit, so it's probably
- The armored deck sloped downward to meet the ships' sides at a point 6 feet (1.8 m) above the waterline and combined with two bulkheads that ran the entire length of the ships, set back several feet from the side, and numerous other bulkheads interspersed among the two main bulkheads; the resulting cellular raft of small compartments was designed to detonate shells before they could penetrate very far into the ships and contain or dampen the effects of the resulting explosion by confining it to small compartments. ; very long sentence trying to tell us several things... I didn't want to risk breaking it up and losing technical meaning, can you take a look?
- See how I've rewritten it.
Nice article. I've made some copyedits as well. --Errant (chat!) 15:00, 18 November 2015 (UTC)
- Thanks again, ErrantX. Parsecboy (talk) 19:42, 19 November 2015 (UTC)
- Tweaked it slightly, because it started and ended with small compartments. Otherwise looks good. I'd be inclined to change Insp Eng to naval engineer, but that's up to you. Passing. --Errant (chat!) 20:03, 19 November 2015 (UTC)