Talk:I Blame Myself/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Prism (talk · contribs) 23:14, 19 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Hey! I will review this on Monday. Could you please ping me here when it's Monday? (I may forget, haha...) prism^△ 23:14, 19 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Just to start this, here are two Pitchfork links for expansion: 1 and 2 (which basically only talks about the song). prism^△ 23:16, 19 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Prism: Sure thing! WikiRedactor (talk) 23:34, 19 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Prism: Pinging you as requested! WikiRedactor (talk) 16:41, 21 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I'm so sorry I didn't start this earlier... honestly I forgot. Sorry! prism^△ 20:09, 28 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Don't worry about it! WikiRedactor (talk) 21:45, 29 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Overview

Disambiguation links:

Prose

Lead

for her (...) → from her (...)

Done

Could you just write a bit on the music video theme and synopsis? Briefly, of course.

Done

Background and composition

I don't like the usage of the term "acknowledging" here, it implies that it's something that everyone knows. We have to take this neutrally, so could you change it to something more neutral?

Done

I think the Summer 2013 information could be moved to the first paragraph, it would be better positioned there.

Done

Try to break sentences like '(x) is (y); (y) said (z)'. This wouldn't be a problem if each part of the sentence wasn't long, however this occurs here. It's simpler to just have them in separate sentences.

Done (I think I've broken up most sentences like this!)

Critical reception

"has displayed" → "displayed"

Done

I think this reception has some stuff that could be in Composition because some of the critics mostly talk about its sound. Try to fish some text here so you can further expand the previous section.

Done, and I added some reviews to beef it up.

You missed that the other Pitchfork writer listed it as one of 2013's best songs (include the position as well).

You mean another one besides number 12? Because the other Pitchfork references don't give a specific ranking for the track (unless I'm missing something?)

Music video

"London-based" → "London"

Done

Who in fact criticized her alleged objectification of African-American people?

Done

Live performances

"acknowledged": not the proper use of this verb here, substitute with 'revealed'

Done

References

One tip so that you don't have to work so hard: periodicals (like Rolling Stone, Elle, NME, Billboard, basically all magazines and newspapers) don't need publisher parameters (just discovered this yesterday!).

I'll finish the article off with both work and publisher just for consistency if that's alright, but thanks for sharing for the future!

Other comments

Well, the article is near perfect (and I'm already working on the article for "You're Not the One"; plus we should co-nominate Night Time, My Time soon) and the only thing that would improve it further would be to include a release date once it's released, however if in a few months it doesn't get released in any way you should list it as just an album song.

I'll keep my eyes peeled for an official release date!

- If it's alright, could you please just develop a little more on the video's synopsis? You don't need to really describe what happens in the video with details, but at least refer how she tries to escape from --possibly-- getting jailtime and how it relates to her personal life (I've read about that in Pitchfork I think). prism^△ 22:17, 30 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

- - I added more about her escaping from jail; in regards to relating to her personal life, are you referring to her family's involvement and her saying that "it's kind of like my response" to real events? Because I can't find any further commentary directly linked to the video.

Review history

April 28, 2014: Review of the article. prism^△ 20:09, 28 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I've taken care of some of your comments today, and I plan on completing the rest tomorrow! WikiRedactor (talk) 21:45, 29 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I think I've taken care of everything now, thanks for your review! WikiRedactor (talk) 21:38, 30 April 2014 (UTC)[reply]