Talk:Hydrus
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[edit]GA Review
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Reviewing |
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Hydrus/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Reviewer: Sasata (talk · contribs) 21:08, 30 September 2013 (UTC)
I usually review these at FAC anyways, so might as well get my nitpicks out of the way. Comments in a couple of days. Sasata (talk) 21:08, 30 September 2013 (UTC)
Comments
- link celestial atlas
- god-damn, I'll remember that one of these days....linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:31, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "it should not be confused" - sounds how-to-y
- tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:31, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "constellation which represents" which->that
- tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 04:31, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- northern hemisphere should be capitalized
- capped Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "the 2.8 magnitude Beta Hydri" hyphenation for adjectival usage; magnitude should be linked in the lead
- hyphenated Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- capitalize Sun (check throughout)
- capped Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- catalog->catalogue
- tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link planisphere, Eridanus
- linked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "Lacaille had shortened its tail to make space for this last constellation." whose tail? In what way was he making space? So that it would fit on the star chart?
- Hydrus' tail. He reduced the size of it to make a new constellation in the night sky. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "Keyzer and de Houtman assigned 15 stars to the constellation in their Malay and Madagascan vocabulary" I don't understand the significance of the Malay and Malagasy vocabs
- I don't either - that is where the constellation material was placed. Weird. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "with a star that what would be" grammar fixing needed
- twaeked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "Gamma the breast" do snakes have breasts?
- chest, then. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 05:32, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "Of these, he labelled two stars close together Eta, Pi and Tau and omitted Omicron and Xi."" confusing … Pi and Tau were the two stars labelled as close to Eta?
- I tried this essentially he called three pairs of stars - Eta1 and Eta2, Pi1 and Pi2, and Tau1 and Tau2...clearer? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:48, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- light year is hyphenated about half the time, and not linked until late in the article
- hyphenated and linked at first instance Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:55, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link luminosity
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:55, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "with the supply at its core becoming exhausted." supply of what
- hydrogen - added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:55, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- neighborhood -> neighbourhood?
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:55, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "one of the oldest stars in the solar neighborhood." whose neighbourhood?
- just means nearby our sun. I could write "near the sun" but might be a bit repetitive. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:09, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "It is also closest bright star to the south celestial pole." how is a bright star defined? The paragraph starts out by saying that "Hydrus does not contain any particularly bright stars."
- I have removed the second sentence as it is subjective...actually they both are. "bright" in this case I suspect means anything of magnitude 3 and brighter, which is a very small minority of visible stars. The south celestial pole region is otherwise populated by very faint stars... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 14:09, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "magnitude 2.9, 71 light-years" the numbers so closely aligned could be confusion, maybe insert "located" after the comma
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:00, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link for south celestial pole?
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:54, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link periodicity, binary system, super eruption, polarized optical and infrared emission, X-ray emission, period
- done - though supereruption is for volcanoes... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:54, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "3° northeast of Gamma" avoid starting a sentence with a number
- "Pi Hydri, composed of Pi1 Hydri and Pi2 Hydri, is divisible in binoculars." does this mean that they can be viewed independently in binocs?
- "that was suspected of being variable" it is no longer suspected of being so?
- correct - would a "once" slipped in help clarify that here? Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:00, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- AU needs to be spelled out/linked on first use
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:00, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link apparent magnitude earlier
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:10, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- capitalize Earth
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:44, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- link deep sky object, spiral galaxy, Large Magellanic Cloud, emission nebula
- done Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:10, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- When was IC 1717 discovered?
- added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:44, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- "Small Magellanic Cloud (SMC)" no need to define acronyms not used later
- removed Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:10, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- odd that star doesn't get linked until the second last sentence!
- delinked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 12:10, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- no mythology?
- none - this is a recently defined fairly faint south polar constellation..... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 11:55, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- water snake links (also in infobox) lead to dabs
- no real point linking that anywhere as it is unclear which snake it'd be anyway, hence delinked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:44, 9 October 2013 (UTC)
- good to add that its area is 0.589% of the night sky per Bagnall 2012?
- added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:32, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- why not mention that Dreyer's now non-existent star was "almost certainly a faint comet"?
- damn, overlooked that -added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:32, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- "However, the coordinate Dreyer observed is no longer there" Is this the correct way to say this? The coordinate is still there, but the once-observed object no longer is…
- tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:32, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- "It also contains a spiral galaxy" Subject of "it" unclear due to content of previous sentence.
- de-pronouned Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:34, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- "and a small irregular galaxy NGC 1473." source?
- I took it out as there is almost nothing written on it. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 13:08, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- according to this source on crisis survival, one can use the position of B hydrus as an accurate navigational reference to find geographic south
- that page is not visible to my location, but sounds like a good thing to add. I can either try by proxy or hope that some US-based person adds it... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:44, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- I sent you a screen capture of the Google Books page. Sasata (talk) 15:58, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- added now, thanks Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:19, 19 October 2013 (UTC)
- I sent you a screen capture of the Google Books page. Sasata (talk) 15:58, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- that page is not visible to my location, but sounds like a good thing to add. I can either try by proxy or hope that some US-based person adds it... Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:44, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- I don't know if there's room or desire for a pop culture mention, but its appearance in Herman Melville's Moby Dick might be worth it: "And beneath the effulgent Antarctic skies I have boarded the Argo-Navis, and joined the chase against the starry Cetus far beyond the utmost stretch of Hydrus and the Flying Fish." (p. 92), a passage that is discussed on page 5 of this source
- I have added it as it adds some colour and engagingness to the characteristics section. Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 06:51, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- the Rudston Monolith in North Yorkshire depicts Hydrus, says this source
- Given Hydrus' far southern location and invisibility to most of the Northern Hemisphere, I can't believe this...and it appears to be the only source for the claim (i.e. not cited in other texts) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 02:44, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- it might be good to mention that the Large Magellanic Cloud lies mostly in the neighbouring Dorado per here (Dorado currently mentioned in info box but not in article)
- added Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 03:46, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- final nitpicks: the number of authors appearing before et al. should be standardized; compare the different formats in Brandão (2011), Setiawan (2005) and Mayor (2011)
- author format for Malin 1995 is different
- tweaked Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 00:19, 19 October 2013 (UTC)
I think my work is done here. Both images are appropriately licensed, and all of the other GA criteria are met. Promoting now... Sasata (talk) 15:58, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
- thx :) Cas Liber (talk · contribs) 19:41, 17 October 2013 (UTC)
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