Talk:Hurricane Helene (1958)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk · contribs) 16:27, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Even though I'm not supposed to...but because you wanted me to so bad. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 16:27, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Accelerating northwards" - northwards? Northward. We've been through this, TAM! >:(

Done - We have? TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Damage across the island totaled to at least C$100,000." - You already said that.

No, one was for NS the other for NFLD. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"A second reconnaissance flight reported a strengthened tropical cyclone, indicating that the storm system had strengthened to tropical storm strength." - Strengthened, strengthened, strength. Repetitive much?

Done - Reworded the stuff. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"The US Weather Bureau issued their first advisory on the newly developed tropical storm at 1600 UTC later that day, giving the storm the name Helene." - I thought they started after recon went in? Or are bulletins different than advisories?

Done - Advisories are different. Bulletins are just sort of notifications. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Steadily intensifying, the tropical storm attained hurricane intensity by 2200 UTC on 2200 UTC on September 24, while located 425 mi (685 km) east of Fort Pierce, Florida." - No need for the lead-in. You already say it was intensifying in the previous sentences.

Done - Removed lead-in. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"However, in post-season analysis, it was found that Helene reached hurricane intensity earlier that day by 1200 UTC." - Comma after day.

Done - Comma'd TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"At the time, gale force winds extended up to 220 mi (355 km) out from the storm's center of circulation.[2]" - Dash between gale and force. Just a regular one.

Done - Dash'd. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"The lack of strong steering currents in the storm's vicinity caused the hurricane to move very slowly throughout the day, giving the hurricane time to significantly intensify." - You sure do mention how the storm strengthened a lot in this MH..

Is that a problem? TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

It's just repetitive to me. See if you can get rid of an instance or two. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 18:12, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Helene strengthened to the equivalent of a modern-day Category 2 hurricane intensity" - Remove intensity.

Done - Removed. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"The major hurricane continued to strengthen, before reaching its peak intensity on September 27 with winds of 135 mph (215 km/h)." - No comma.

Done - Removed comma. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)}

"...though it still maintained hurricane force winds." - Dash. Same for the next sentence.

Done - Dash'd. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

" This coincided with the US Weather Bureau's final advisory on the system." - Merge to the previous sentence.

Done - Merge'd? TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Gale warning issuance reflected the changes and were too shifted northwards to the Virginia Capes area, while hurricane watches covered both warning areas." - Northward.

Done - Didn't we go through this before? TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Shortly after, all warnings with the exception of the offshore gale warnings were discontinued." - Comma after both "warnings".

Done - Even more comma'd. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)}

"Despite not issuing any warnings, the Weather Bureau cautioned interests in Newfoundland and forecasted hurricane-force winds to effect the island" - Comma after Newfoundland.

Done - COMMA'D! TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"...Governor of South Carolina George Bell Timmerman, Jr.." - Grammar time! Only one period is needed to cover the end of this sentence.

Done - In this episode of grammar time. 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)

" Despite repeated orders for mandatory evacuation, some people remained in Myrtle Beach." - Some sounds...un-smart, lol. Perhaps "many" or "a few".

Done - Smartified. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Though surveys made no damage estimates, damage in Holden Beach was reported to have been worse than Long Beach." - In before Long.

Done - In'd. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

"Effects from Helene in South Carolina were less severe than in North Carolina, with the hurricane making its closest approach to the state on September 27, 85 mi (135 km)." - Am confus.

Done - Split. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Some references don't have authors. If it was from a newspaper or anything like that, state "Staff writer".

Done - I thought this was a discouraged practice in GAN/FAC. TheAustinMan^{(Talk·Works)} 18:02, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Definitely will pass when the above issues are addressed. TropicalAnalystwx13 (talk) 16:54, 15 March 2013 (UTC)[reply]