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Talk:Hurricane Barbara (2013)/GA1

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GA Review

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Reviewer: Dana boomer (talk · contribs) 00:36, 11 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

Hi! I'll be reviewing this article for GA status, and should have my full review up shortly. Dana boomer (talk) 00:36, 11 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, no copyvios, spelling and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
    • "The rainbands of Barbara wrapped a large area around the circulation, and radar imagery indicated the eyewall is consistently becoming better defined." I don't understand what the first part is trying to say, and why is the second part in present tense?
    • "The cloud tops have warmed" Again, why present tense?
    • "soon dissipated near 25 mi" near -> almost?
    • "Lagunas de Chacahua to Boca de Pijijiapan" Links?
    • "set up in 20 towns or hamlets." or -> and?
    • "In addition, classes were suspended in Oaxaca." What kind of classes? Primary/secondary schools, colleges, continuing education, exercise?
    • The end of the Preparations section has a bunch of repetitiously structured short sentences in a row, making it read very choppily: In all,...In addition,...Meanwhile,...Furthermore... For instance, "Meanwhile, both large boats and small boats were anchored in Playa Manzanillo, to prevent the strong winds and rough seas. Furthermore, water sports were suspended in Acapulco." could be rewritten as "Both large and small boats were anchored in Playa Manzanillo, to prevent the strong winds and rough seas, and water sports were suspended in Acapulco." This combines a couple of short sentences to mix up the length thing, and removes the unnecessary/repetitive bridging words.
    • "to prevent the strong winds and rough seas." to prevent them from doing what? I don't think you mean the anchoring process made the winds and seas not happen, which is how it reads now.
    • The sentence referenced in the above two points ("Meanwhile...Acapulco") could use linking of the place names.
    • "shelters had to be accommodated for seven people." Huh? Does this mean that seven people took refuge in shelters?
    • "Guerrero, Veracruz." Should this be "Guerrero and Veracruz"?
    • "caused severe flooding by resorts" by -> near?
    • You say "Two people were killed in Oaxaca.", but then list three dead plus four missing/dead fishermen.
    • Were there no further sources to give finality to the story of the four missing fishermen? Have they been declared dead? Still missing?
    • I meant that the quick search did not mention any updates on the four missing people.
    • "In both cities, three shelters were opened," Three shelters were opened in each, or total?
    • Overall, I'm seeing underlinking of specific places (see comments above on linking) and overlinking in other places, especially states. For example, Chiapas is linked twice in the lead and three more times in the body, Guatemala is linked twice in the lead, Oaxaca is linked twice in the body, etc. Generally, one link to a topic in the lead and another in the body is quite sufficient.
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
    • Ref #33 (Georgina Saldierna) is a dead link.
    • Make sure that all non-English refs are marked as such. For example, see #37 (Declaran emergencia).
    • What makes Noticias (refs #41 and 42) a reliable source? Also, is it Noticias or Noticias Net?
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:
    Overall, the prose needs some work (beyond the copyedits I have made), and I have a couple of questions on the references. I'm placing the article on hold until the above can be addressed. Dana boomer (talk) 01:55, 11 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    Looking much better. See my replies above on one point of prose, plus still waiting for replies/final comments on one prose niggle and one reference issue. Dana boomer (talk) 00:45, 12 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    I worked on this article when it was active as well, so I attempted to reply to the aforementioned issues. Cheers. YE Pacific Hurricane 02:13, 12 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    Just waiting on replies to the two unstruck prose issues above, I think, and then this should be good to go... Dana boomer (talk) 16:20, 16 October 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    This review has been ongoing for almost a month now. Anyway, EM-DAT, which is a source that is used as a final death toll, says that Barbara caused 4 fatalities. Go onto this page and select Mexico under Country, 2013 under Year, and Storm under Disaster type. With 3 deaths in Mexico, this probably means that one of the four missing people died or was presumed to have lost their life. As for the issue with Noticias, YE and I have already pointed out that it is a reliable source.--12george1 (talk) 17:16, 7 November 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    Oops, sorry, the other issue I was referring to was the issue regarding the shelters in the prose section, where you said the source doesn't even cover the information given. This needs to be rectified... Dana boomer (talk) 21:01, 8 November 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    Whoa, I thought I removed that statement already (since I can neither clarify or find it in the source). AFAIK, there aren't any other sources that can verify that statement.--12george1 (talk) 04:53, 11 November 2013 (UTC)[reply]
    Cool, looks good. Sorry for the miscommunication on what I was waiting for! Now passing the article... Dana boomer (talk) 15:39, 11 November 2013 (UTC)[reply]