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GA Review

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Reviewer: FunkMonk (talk · contribs) 23:17, 14 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Okay, I'll have a run through them all - what I've just discovered is my spellchecker will only highlight errors that I've typed in myself, to get it to trip on an existing bit of prose, you need to click on the text in question, at which point "color" appears in red and is easily fixable. There was only one instance in this article (presumably because "inverse-colour" was already in the article, is trivial to verify and didn't need copyediting). Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 23:23, 14 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "A series of rock 'n' roll covers were recorded" Any titles known?
I've added everything the source says, but since nobody's heard the tape outside the immediate band circle, it's impossible to say any more :-/ Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "for the untitled fourth album" WOuld seem more congruent with the rest of the article to say "their".
Yup, fixed Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Done Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 00:57, 15 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It avoided the heavy style of Led Zeppelin II, the acoustic-oriented Led Zeppelin III" In this context, "acoustic orientation of" would maybe be more fitting?
Done Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "a tongue-in-check joke" Cheek?
D'oh, fixed Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 00:57, 15 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "and was released on the follow-up, Physical Graffiti" Give date?
Done Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • There is some duplinking, perhaps try the script I linked once.
Forgot to run it. Oops. Done. Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 00:57, 15 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Because of his home studio, he was able to present a complete arrangement of "The Rain Song" and "The Rain Song" was composed at Page's home studio, which allowed him to bring a complete arrangement to the recording sessions" Repetitive.
Done Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "An early arrangement of the song was attempted for the fourth album, but abandoned. Jones reworked the track to add acoustic and electric piano, and various synthesizers." All of this is already stated under recording.
Trimmed the first mention. That should really just be a summary; the detail can go in the individual song paragraphs. Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "the band fired him and hired Powell in his place.[19] However, Hipgnosis went on to produce the album artwork for Led Zeppelin's subsequent albums Presence and In Through the Out Door." Since Powell also worked for Hipgnosis, the latter sentence seems a bit misleading.
I've removed this as I think it's a bit off-topic. If you want to know about the artwork for those albums, read the articles! Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
  • "It represents a turning point in musical direction for the group... in contrast to the simpler rock music heard on earlier albums" Only stated as such in the intro.
I don't think we need to go into that much detail for the lead - trimmed. Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

@FunkMonk: Yikes, I'd forgotten all about this! I'll hopefully fix all the other issues tomorrow, touch wood. Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 16:52, 17 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]

Hehe, still over the hills and far away? FunkMonk (talk) 17:00, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Nope, resolved the issues now, I think. Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 20:50, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Alright, passed, on to the next albums! FunkMonk (talk) 23:59, 19 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]
Yup, we're getting there! Ritchie333 (talk) (cont) 08:22, 20 August 2018 (UTC)[reply]