Talk:Homura Akemi/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Lee Vilenski (talk · contribs) 12:22, 11 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I am planning on reviewing this article for GA Status, over the next couple of days. Thank you for nominating the article for GA status. I hope I will learn some new information, and that my feedback is helpful.

If nominators or editors could refrain from updating the particular section that I am updating until it is complete, I would appreciate it to remove a edit conflict. Please address concerns in the section that has been completed above (If I've raised concerns up to references, feel free to comment on things like the lede.)

I generally provide an overview of things I read through the article on a first glance. Then do a thorough sweep of the article after the feedback is addressed. After this, I will present the pass/failure. I may use strikethrough tags when concerns are met. Even if something is obvious why my concern is met, please leave a message as courtesy.

Best of luck! you can also use the {{done}} tag to state when something is addressed. Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)}

Please let me know after the review is done, if you were happy with the review! Obviously this is regarding the article's quality, however, I want to be happy and civil to all, so let me know if I have done a good job, regardless of the article's outcome.

Immediate Failures

It is a long way from meeting any one of the six good article criteria -
It contains copyright infringements -
It has, or needs, cleanup banners that are unquestionably still valid. These include{{cleanup}}, {{POV}}, {{unreferenced}} or large numbers of {{citation needed}}, {{clarify}}, or similar tags. (See also {{QF-tags}}). -
It is not stable due to edit warring on the page. -

Links

Prose

Lede

Chiwa Saito is missing an accent Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- You mean her Japanese romanization? – Like this "Chiwa Saitō"? NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - I do - or at least her article has the diacritic on the o as well. We should be consistent with names in this way. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:16, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    - Done NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 14:08, 26 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Madoka from making contract with the messenger of magic - something is wrong here "Madoka from making a contract with the messenger of magic" or Madoka from making contact with the messenger of magic"? Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Fixed. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Do we need to link surreal? Seems like a common enough word. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Removed link. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
I feel the first para on the conception and such is probably the more notable stuff than her canon. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- What do you mean? Could you elaborate more? NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Chiwa Saito voices her in the Japanese version of the series, while Cristina Vee voices her in the English version. - repeat "voices her", but there should be a better way to say this. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Revised. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
remains popular among fans - do we really care about this? Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Well, she still tops anime character polls in Japan so I thought it's worth mentioning. If you feel it's unnecessary then I will remove it! NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - Might be worth saying exactly that - rather than the more general overview. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:17, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    - Removed as I feel it's unnecessary. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 14:08, 26 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
For voicing Homura, Saito won the 2011 Newtype Anime Award for Best Supporting Actress. - move to the section on voice acting. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:21, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Removed sentence. It's already in the "Critical response" section. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

General

Accent for Saito in the caption also needs an accent. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The article in general has some issues with linking quite common terms - heart disease, experiment, masterpiece et al. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Removed links. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
In The Rebellion Story is uncited. If this were plot, it isn't so bad, but at least a citation for the translations. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
PlayStation Portable action video game WP:SEAOFBLUE/ Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Critical response has a major issue with WP:CITEKILL. 3 is the maximum amount of citations in a row - either kill the ones not needed, or try WP:BUNDLING. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Done. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
"Analysis" seems pretty WP:CRUFTY in my eyes - specifically the quotes. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- So what do you suggest? Should I rewrite the section or just trim? NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - Trim the quotes - I'm a bit of a stickler for only adding quotes that actually make (or agree to) points in the article. There's a lot of quite long quotes that could be trimmed a bit. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 20:19, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
    - I trimmed some of the quotes. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 14:08, 26 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Merchandising could do with an image - but seems like mostly a list of things that they have merchandise of. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 15:27, 18 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Thanks for the review! I will go through it and address the points you have noted in the next few days. NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 17:49, 19 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - No worries. It's a nice article. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 18:23, 19 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

GA Review

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Review meta comments

I'll begin the review as soon as I can! If you fancy returning the favour, I have a list of nominations for review at WP:GAN and WP:FAC, respectively. I'd be very grateful if you were to complete one of these if you get time. Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 12:22, 11 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
- Any updates on this NotEnglishSpeaker? Best Wishes, Lee Vilenski ^{(talk • contribs)} 16:39, 24 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  - I'm very sorry for getting late to it, I've been really busy lately...Anyways, great review! Looking forward to your responses! NotEnglishSpeaker (talk) 13:06, 25 September 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.