Talk:He Siyuan/GA1
- The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.
GA Review
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Reviewer: MX (talk · contribs) 19:29, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
Review
[edit]Review done. MX (✉ • ✎) 21:56, 19 November 2018 (UTC)
- @Zanhe: Pinging you here per the message I left on your talkpage. MX (✉ • ✎) 15:36, 30 November 2018 (UTC)
Lead paragraph
[edit]- After World War II he became Mayor – The word "World War II" is mentioned here but not in the body. Per WP:LEADCITE, everything in the body has to be mentioned elsewhere. Perhaps not explicity, but I think we should mention "World War II" somewhere in the sections. I know the Surrender of Japan is part of WWII, but we can't expect our readers to know that. A simple mention should fix this.
- Added World War II to article body. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Infobox
[edit]- I'm a bit picky with unsourced info in the infobox. I noticed that you mention these people but don't provide a mention of them elsewhere in the body paragraphs: Xiong Bin, Liu Yaozhang, Xue Yue, and Wang Yaowu. Per WP:INFOBOXCITE, the information in the infobox has to be cited elsewhere in the body paragraphs.
- I've found and added sources for three of the four people, but couldn't find a reliable online source for Xue Yue, so had to remove him for now. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
- Political party – Infobox states he was part of the Revolutionary Committee of the Chinese Kuomintang, but that is not mentioned in the body. His daughter was, but that's all we got.
- The Revolutionary Committee of the Chinese Kuomintang is the splinter party of Kuomintang that supported the Communists in the Civil War. It's not really necessary for the infobox, so I removed it. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
- Autumn 1944 – Just curious, but do we have the month so we can keep the same format as the rest of the dates? If not, no problem. We'll work with what we got...
- Found a source that mentions the actual month, it's actually December 1944, after his meeting with Chiang Kai-shek in autumn. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Early life and education
[edit]He published many articles in the Xinchao journal. – Is it italicized? It wasn't italicized in the previous mention (unless this is the name of the journal, which in that case is fine).
- Yes, the Xinchao Society published a journal also called Xinchao.
Study abroad
[edit]- After participating in the May Fourth Movement in 1919, He left for the United States – He → He Siyuan; you use "He Siyuan" in other mentions later so trying to keep this consistent.
- Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
- Deeply concerned with China's weakness at the time – Weakness in what? Political weakness?
- Added "political". -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
- There he met his future wife, a Frenchwoman who later adopted the Chinese name He Yiwen – Just out of curiosity, do sources mention her French name? I think it would be good to include it. This can help improve the article if someone is able to find sources on her / him during that time prior to the name change. You never know.
- The Chinese sources only give a Chinese transcription of her name 宜文妮·詹姆斯, which sounds like Yveni James. But I can't reconstruct the original French name with certainty, so have to leave it out. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Academic and government career
[edit]- He joined the Kuomintang in 1927. – Would "Koumintang political party" instead of simply "Kuomintang" work? Or is it redundant? I had to click the article to know what the word was, and at that point you may lose a reader from finishing the article.
- Added "Nationalist Party", another name of Kuomintang. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
- Despite the lack of funds, He invested – He Siyuan
- Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Military career during the Sino-Japanese War
[edit]- He sent Yiwen and their four children to live – He Siyuan
- He reported to Chiang Kai-shek – He Siyuan
- Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Surrender of Beijing
[edit]- supplied He's guerrilla force – He Siyuan
- In January 1949, He negotiated – He Siyuan
- Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
People's Republic of China
[edit]- I actually want to talk about the title of this section. Wouldn't "Death and legacy" be more accurate than just "People's Republic of China", which tells readers nothing about what's to come other than the founding of People's Republic of China.
- Changed to "Later life and legacy". -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Sources
[edit]- Ji Jianqing (季剑青) (2011). "走向实践的新文化——何思源与五四新文化运动". Beijing Observer. – Needs the language template since it is in Chinese.
- Yue Nan (2009). 陳寅恪與傅斯年 [Chen Yinke and Fu Sinian]. Yuanliu Publishing. p. 90. ISBN 978-957-32-6503-0. – Same here
- He Luli (16 November 2015). "何思源山东自组游击队坚持抗战". Yangzi Evening News. – Same here
- Done. -Zanhe (talk) 10:07, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
@MX: Thanks for your thorough review and I apologize for my delayed response. I've edited the article to incorporate all your suggestions, with the exception of two issues (Xue Yue and He Yiwen's French name) which I'm unable to resolve due to lack of available source. Please see my explanations above. -Zanhe (talk) 10:14, 1 December 2018 (UTC)
Thank you for your reply. Article checks out and is ready for promotion. MX (✉ • ✎) 22:13, 2 December 2018 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.