Talk:Harriet Bell Hayden

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James Tow: Your lead section should start by addressing your subject by name (e.g., Harriet Bell Hayden was an activist...) and afterward refer to her by personal pronouns. I would also move the section about Hayden's house to the end of your article. I think more information on Hayden's work in the abolition movement would be helpful, though her family life is thoroughly covered (maybe there is not enough source material to write more though?) The basic structure is fine; it just needs to be filled in a little bit. The content is balanced and objective. The sources look excellent. This is a nice start. Good luck!

Your article is very neutral, stating only solid biographical information. The structure of the article is also very well done, as it is straightforward and clear. I think the Legacy section was a beneficial addition. Your sources all look legitimate and academic. Great work finding a picture to post on the page, makes it look professional. As for the balance, one section that could use some more attention is “Underground Railroad Activism.” You could reword the first sentence to be more informative, such as when was it opened, and where and why she wanted to help. Some suggestions I have are to proofread once more, there was a few uses of “Hayden’s” in which the apostrophe isn’t necessary as it’s not possessive. In the Birth and Early Life section, avoid repetition of the word “assistance” in the sentence about Reverend Calvin Fairbank, perhaps reword it, “which led to his arrest and sentencing...” In the lead you may want to switch slaves to African Americans as “slaves” was repetitive with “slavery.” Good Luck! (Ambertollerud (talk) 23:00, 28 November 2018 (UTC))[reply]

Prof. Smith feedback: Hi Leif,

You're off to a great start for your article. You have a strong foundation of sources and the article is very thorough. One source I thought of that might be helpful is Stephen Kantrowitz's book, More than Freedom. There is a lot on the Hayden family in there. I don't know if our library has it, but you could certainly take a look on Google Books.

In terms of improvements to the essay, your peers have give you really valuable advice above about style and structure that I was going to point out. So, be sure to follow their comments carefully. I'll elaborate on a few more: 1) Strengthen the lead as James suggests by moving the information about her home down to the "Legacy" section. Include her birth and death dates in the lead right after her name. I would also make the lead stronger and more specific with something like "was an African American antislavery activist in Boston, Massachusetts. She and her husband, Louis Hayden, were the primary operators of the Underground Railroad in Boston and also aided the John Brown slave revolt conspiracy."

2) Be sure to fill out your See Also and External Links sections. You'll obviously want to include See Also links to Louis Hayden and the Underground Railroad. Maybe include External Links to the Hayden House park service site and the Hayden scholarship at Harvard? StaceySmithOSU (talk) 17:33, 1 December 2018 (UTC)Prof. SmithStaceySmithOSU (talk) 17:33, 1 December 2018 (UTC)[reply]