Talk:Hans Philipp/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Seabuckthorn (talk · contribs) 10:04, 11 February 2014 (UTC)
Nominator: MisterBee1966 (talk)

Hi! My review for this article will be here shortly. --Seabuckthorn ♥ 10:04, 11 February 2014 (UTC)

1: Well-written

• a. Prose is "clear and concise", without copyvios, or spelling and grammar errors:
• b. MoS compliance for lead, layout, words to watch, fiction, and lists:

WP:LEAD:

Check for WP:LEAD: Check for Correct Structure of Lead Section:  Done Check for Citations (WP:LEADCITE):  Done Check for Introductory text:  Done Check for Provide an accessible overview (MOS:INTRO):  Done Major Point 1: Childhood and education "Born in Meissen,[Note 1] Philipp grew up in the Weimar Republic and Third Reich" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 2: Early career "and volunteered for military service in the Wehrmacht in 1936. Following flight training, he was posted to Jagdgeschwader 76 (JG 76—76th Fighter Wing)" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 3: World War II "and participated in the Invasion of Poland and as a Staffelkapitän (squadron leader) in the Battle of France. His unit was reformed to II./Jagdgeschwader 54 (JG 54—54th Fighter Wing) in June 1940." (summarised well in the lead) (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body, the Battle of Britain should be summarized.) Major Point 3.1: Battle of Britain "" (not a concise summary of the corresponding section in the body) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 3.2: Balkans campaign and Operation Barbarossa "He then fought in the aerial battles of the Balkans Campaign and Operation Barbarossa, the German invasion of the Soviet Union. He received the Knight's Cross of the Iron Cross with Oak Leaves (Ritterkreuz des Eisernen Kreuzes mit Eichenlaub) after 62 aerial victories on 24 August 1941" (summarised well in the lead) Major Point 3.3: Eastern Front "and the Swords (Schwerter) to his Knight's Cross on 12 March 1942, his score now at 86 aerial victories. He claimed his 100th victory on 31 March 1942, the fourth fighter pilot to achieve this mark,[Note 2] and his 150th aerial victory on 14 January 1943. Philipp claimed four aircraft shot down on 17 March 1943 taking his total to 203 aerial victories. He thus surpassed Hermann Graf as the leading German fighter pilot at the time, and six months after Graf, became the second pilot to claim more than 200 victories." (summarised well in the lead) Major Point 3.4: Geschwaderkommodore of JG 1 and death "Philipp was promoted to Major (major) and given command as a Geschwaderkommodore (wing commander) of Jagdgeschwader 1 (JG 1—1st Fighter Wing) on 1 April 1943, operating in Defense of the Reich against the United States Army Air Forces (USAAF). He was promoted to Oberstleutnant (lieutenant colonel) on 1 October 1943 and was killed in action a week later on 8 October during an attack on Bremen. It is believed that he was shot down by the P-47 Thunderbolt pilot Robert S. Johnson. Philipp managed to bail out but his parachute failed to open." (summarised well in the lead) Check for Relative emphasis:  Done Major Point 1: Childhood and education "Born in Meissen,[Note 1] Philipp grew up in the Weimar Republic and Third Reich" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 2: Early career "and volunteered for military service in the Wehrmacht in 1936. Following flight training, he was posted to Jagdgeschwader 76 (JG 76—76th Fighter Wing)" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 3: World War II "and participated in the Invasion of Poland and as a Staffelkapitän (squadron leader) in the Battle of France. His unit was reformed to II./Jagdgeschwader 54 (JG 54—54th Fighter Wing) in June 1940." (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body, the Battle of Britain should be summarized.) done, please check MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Checked. Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Major Point 3.1: Battle of Britain "" (the lead does not give due weight as is given in the body) Major Point 3.2: Balkans campaign and Operation Barbarossa "He then fought in the aerial battles of the Balkans Campaign and Operation Barbarossa, the German invasion of the Soviet Union. He received the Knight's Cross of the Iron Cross with Oak Leaves (Ritterkreuz des Eisernen Kreuzes mit Eichenlaub) after 62 aerial victories on 24 August 1941" (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body) Major Point 3.3: Eastern Front "and the Swords (Schwerter) to his Knight's Cross on 12 March 1942, his score now at 86 aerial victories. He claimed his 100th victory on 31 March 1942, the fourth fighter pilot to achieve this mark,[Note 2] and his 150th aerial victory on 14 January 1943. Philipp claimed four aircraft shot down on 17 March 1943 taking his total to 203 aerial victories. He thus surpassed Hermann Graf as the leading German fighter pilot at the time, and six months after Graf, became the second pilot to claim more than 200 victories." (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body) Major Point 3.4: Geschwaderkommodore of JG 1 and death "Philipp was promoted to Major (major) and given command as a Geschwaderkommodore (wing commander) of Jagdgeschwader 1 (JG 1—1st Fighter Wing) on 1 April 1943, operating in Defense of the Reich against the United States Army Air Forces (USAAF). He was promoted to Oberstleutnant (lieutenant colonel) on 1 October 1943 and was killed in action a week later on 8 October during an attack on Bremen. It is believed that he was shot down by the P-47 Thunderbolt pilot Robert S. Johnson. Philipp managed to bail out but his parachute failed to open." (the lead gives due weight as is given in the body) Check for Opening paragraph (MOS:BEGIN):  Done Check for First sentence (WP:LEADSENTENCE):  Done "Hans Philipp (17 March 1917 – 8 October 1943) was a German Luftwaffe fighter ace during World War II." Check for Format of the first sentence (MOS:BOLDTITLE):  Done Check for Proper names and titles:  Done Check for Abbreviations and synonyms (MOS:BOLDSYN): None Check for Foreign language (MOS:FORLANG): None Check for Pronunciation: None Check for Contextual links (MOS:CONTEXTLINK):  Done Check for Biographies: NA Check for Organisms: NA Check for Biographies of living persons: NA Check for Alternative names (MOS:LEADALT):  Done Check for Non-English titles: Check for Usage in first sentence: Check for Separate section usage: Check for Length (WP:LEADLENGTH):  Done Check for Clutter (WP:LEADCLUTTER): None

WP:LAYOUT:

Done Check for WP:LAYOUT:  Done Check for Body sections: WP:BODY, MOS:BODY.  Done Check for Headings and sections:  Done Check for Section templates and summary style:  Done Check for Paragraphs (MOS:PARAGRAPHS):  Done Check for Standard appendices and footers (MOS:APPENDIX):  Done Check for Order of sections (WP:ORDER):  Done Check for Works or publications:  Done Check for See also section (MOS:SEEALSO):  Done Check for Notes and references (WP:FNNR):  Done Check for Further reading (WP:FURTHER):  Done Check for External links (WP:LAYOUTEL):  Done Check for Links to sister projects:  Done Check for Navigation templates:  Done Check for Formatting:  Done Check for Images (WP:LAYIM):  Done Check for Links:  Done Check for Horizontal rule (WP:LINE):  Done

WP:WTW:

Done Check for WP:WTW:  Done Check for Words that may introduce bias:  Done Check for Puffery (WP:PEA):  Done Check for Contentious labels (WP:LABEL):  Done Check for Unsupported attributions (WP:WEASEL):  Done Check for Expressions of doubt (WP:ALLEGED):  Done Check for Editorializing (MOS:OPED):  Done Check for Synonyms for said (WP:SAY):  Done Check for Expressions that lack precision:  Done Check for Euphemisms (WP:EUPHEMISM):  Done Check for Clichés and idioms (WP:IDIOM):  Done Check for Relative time references (WP:REALTIME):  Done Check for Neologisms (WP:PEA): None Check for Offensive material (WP:F***):  Done Check for WP:MOSFICT:  Done Check for Real-world perspective (WP:Real world):  Done Check for Primary and secondary information (WP:PASI):  Done Check for Contextual presentation (MOS:PLOT):  Done

WP:EMBED:

Done Prose is preferred over list (WP:PROSE): I think the list of instructions in the section Geschwaderkommodore of JG 1 and death can be converted to prose. I am echoing the style presented in literature. Since Göring had issued his "rules" as a list I prefer to keep it as such. I hope you don't object. MisterBee1966 (talk) 17:17, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Okay! Thanks! --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC) Check for Tables (MOS:TABLES):

2: Verifiable with no original research

• a. Has an appropriate reference section: Yes
• b. Citation to reliable sources where necessary: excellent (Thorough check on Google. Cross-checked with the other FAs.)

WP:RS:

Done Check for WP:RS:  Done Cross-checked with the other FAs: Heinrich Bär, Helmut Lent, Werner Mölders, Ernst Lindemann Check for the material (WP:RSVETTING): (contentious)  Done Is it contentious?: Yes Does the ref indeed support the material?: Check for the author (WP:RSVETTING):  Done Who is the author?: Does the author have a Wikipedia article?: What are the author's academic credentials and professional experience?: What else has the author published?: Is the author, or this work, cited in other reliable sources? In academic works?: Check for the publication (WP:RSVETTING):  Done Check for Self-published sources (WP:SPS):

WP:MINREF:
Done Check for inline citations WP:MINREF:  Done Check for Direct quotations:  Done Check for Likely to be challenged:  Done Check for Contentious material about living persons (WP:BLP): NA

• c. No original research:  Done

WP:NOR:
Done Check for primary sources (WP:PRIMARY):  Done Check for synthesis (WP:SYN):  Done Check for original images (WP:OI):  Done

3: Broad in its coverage

a. Major aspects:

Done Cross-checked with the other FAs: Heinrich Bär, Helmut Lent, Werner Mölders, Ernst Lindemann Check for Article scope as defined by reliable sources: Check for The extent of the subject matter in these RS: Check for Out of scope: Check for The range of material that belongs in the article: Check for All material that is notable is covered: Check for All material that is referenced is covered: Check for All material that a reader would be likely to agree matches the specified scope is covered: Check for The most general scope that summarises essentially all knowledge: Check for Stay on topic and no wandering off-topic (WP:OFFTOPIC):

b. Focused:
Done Check for Readability issues (WP:LENGTH): Check for Article size (WP:TOO LONG!):

4: Neutral

WP:NPOV:

Done 4. Fair representation without bias:  Done Check for POV (WP:YESPOV):  Done Check for naming (WP:POVNAMING):  Done Check for structure (WP:STRUCTURE):  Done Check for Due and undue weight (WP:DUE):  Done Check for Balancing aspects (WP:BALASPS):  Done Check for Giving "equal validity" (WP:VALID):  Done Check for Balance (WP:YESPOV):  Done Check for Impartial tone (WP:IMPARTIAL):  Done Check for Describing aesthetic opinions (WP:SUBJECTIVE):  Done Check for Words to watch (WP:YESPOV):  Done Check for Attributing and specifying biased statements (WP:ATTRIBUTEPOV):  Done Check for Fringe theories and pseudoscience (WP:PSCI): None Check for Religion (WP:RNPOV): None

5: Stable: No edit wars, etc: Yes

6: Images  Done (NFC with a valid FUR) & (PD)

Images:

Done 6: Images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content:  Done Check for copyright tags (WP:TAGS):  Done Check for copyright status:  Done Check for non-free content (WP:NFC):  Done Check for valid fair use rationales (WP:FUR):  Done 6: Images are provided if possible and are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions:  Done Check for image relevance (WP:IMAGE RELEVANCE):  Done Check for Images for the lead (WP:LEADIMAGE):  Done Check for suitable captions (WP:CAPTION):  Done

MisterBee1966, I'm very happy and inspired to see your work here. I do have some insights based on the above checklist that I think will improve the article:

• I think the lead can be improved in order to provide an accessible overview and to give relative emphasis.
• I think the list can be converted to prose.

Besides that, I think the article looks excellent. Please feel free to strike out any recommendation from this review which you think will not help in improving the article which is our main aim here. All the best, --Seabuckthorn ♥ 06:29, 17 February 2014 (UTC)

Promoting the article to GA status. --Seabuckthorn ♥ 18:34, 17 February 2014 (UTC)