Talk:Hands to Myself/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Cartoon network freak (talk · contribs) 21:32, 4 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

It was inspired to add fresh, female perspective to → It is meant to add a fresh female perspective to...
Prince → American singer Prince
During the song, Gomez uses both → use "the track" here for alternation
her enunciation of the lyrics which detail → comma before "which"
The video depicts a film of Gomez dressed → use "the singer" here for alternation
Gomez promoted "Hands to Myself" → Use "She" here
with a televised performances → remove "a"
It has also been lip-synced to by the Victoria's Secret Angels in a promotional video, and used in Beats Electronics' commercial for their Beats Pill portable speaker and was also used in a television commercial for Pantene. → It has also been lip-synched to by the...., used in Beats Electronics' commercial..., and featured in a television...
You need to create a "Usage in media" section where you paste this sentence (except Victoria's Secret rendition, but along with maybe other usages). You have to find references for all these, as the current ref is only about the Pantene commercial
becoming her fourth consecutive top ten → use "the singer's" here

Infobox

Flawless ;)

Writing and production

Unlink Selena Gomez
was described by Gomez as "a → use "the singer" here
with Michaels and Tranter despite → with the two despite
Before the sessions began, Gomez → use "she" here
with production from Mattman & Robin who told Gomez → comma before "who"
ad libtum → remove italics and hide the link with "ad libs"

Composition and lyrical interpretation

plays beneath it → this doesn't fit in the sentence. Can you remove it?
Remove italics from "crescendo", as well as from the sample's description
with Gomez's vocal breaking into → comma before "with"
Lyrically, "Hands to Myself" express → The lyrics of "Hands to Myself" express
and wish to find love through → and capture the singer's desire to find love through
"Hands to Myself" is written in the key of E♭ major with a tempo of 111 beats per minute. The song follows a chord progression of E♭ – Gm – Cm – B♭, and Gomez' vocals span from B♭3 to C#5. → please paste this at the ends of the first paragraph

Critical reception

from Drowned in Sound deemed it a "laser-focused → use "Hands to Myself" instead of "it"
Similarly, Los Angeles Times critic Mikael Wood commended Gomez's → use "the singer's" here
"Billboard's 100 Best Pop Songs of 2016: Critics' Picks" list, writing “Breathy, sexy fun, and Selena Gomez's → comma after "writing"

Chart performance

Rename the section into "Commercial performance"
Interscope's promotion, and strong → no comma
announced release date after an accompanying music video that shows → announced release date, aided by a promotional music video showing
"Hands to Myself" debuted at number 77 → use "The track" here
number 77 in the US Billboard Hot 100 → the preposition here is "on"
As of July 7, 2016 Hands to Myself has sold → As of July 7, 2016, "Hands to Myself" has sol
in the US → write out to "United States
Link "Nielsen Soundscan"
marking it as Gomez's highest → making it Gomez's highest
top-five → top five
"Hands to Myself" debuted at number → "Hands to Myself" has further opened at position
top-twenty single → top 20 single
highest charting → highest-charting

Music video

love interest in the music video → use "clip" here as alternation
Gomez and Keshishian → use "They" here
The clip which heavily features the Beats Pill tied in as Beats Electronics' commercial for the product → Isn't this the same you mentioned before?
a wig and black silk robe → add "a" before black
On arrival, Gomez takes → Use "the singer" here
Gomez is then depicted writhing → Use "She" for alternation
Tired, she proceeds back upstairs → Tired, she goes back upstairs
Mason later arrives home and realizes that something is wrong and calls → Mason eventually arrives home and finds multiple things not at their place, following which he calls
It was well received → The clip was well-received
Unlink "Billboard"
Daniel Barna remarked that Gomez "looks → use "the singer" here

Live performances and cover versions

Unlink "Victoria's Secret..." as mentioned before
out singing on top a satin → out singing on top of a satin
Then a second dancer appeared (a female) and joined → This was followed by a second female dancer appearing and joining
On December 1, 2015, the Victoria's Secret Angels released a promotional video in which they lip-synced to "Hands to Myself". → This was already mentioned before, so please remove this
Link "BBC Radio" to its article on Wiki
"Hands to Myself" was included on the setlist for Gomez's 2016 Revival Tour.[74] → Include this at the end of the first paragraph, but change to: The track had been further included on the setlist for the singer's...

Track listings

You need references for both formats

Credits and personnel

Unlink "Revival" + say "...the liner notes of Revival"

Charts

Flawless ;)

Certifications

Flawless ;)

Release history

Fixed table by myself

Notes

Gomez is not credited as a writer on Revival booklet, although she is listed as a writer in both ASCAP and BMI repertoires → Gomez is not credited as a writer on the liner notes of Revival, but is listed as a composer in both...

Other stuff

Copy-violation

34.6% is super!

Outcome

~~These are my first comments. I will decide if I will pass it or not on how the work progresses. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 19:43, 5 September 2017 (UTC)~~[reply]
- I sadly have to fail this. A lot of links are not correctly formatted, there's original research and links are dead. You also are not a significant contributor to the page, so you haven't checked it against the GA criteria before the nomination. Please don't feel discouraged, but I feel like these are too many issues to solve in 7 days. Best, Cartoon network freak (talk) 06:39, 6 September 2017 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.