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Talk:Ghidorah, the Three-Headed Monster/GA1

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Reviewer: Mike Christie (talk · contribs) 20:34, 20 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]


I'll review this. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 20:34, 20 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]

The poster image has a suitable FUR.

  • What makes the following reliable sources?
    • ld-dvd-bluray.2-d.jp
    • bloody-disgusting.com
  • There's some repetition in the lead re the recycling of the suits.
  • "The film was followed by Invasion of Astro-Monster, released on December 19, 1965": should specify that Invasion of Astro-Monster is the following film in the Godzilla franchise.
  • "After deeming the session a failure due to Naoko's skepticism, a meteor shower descends on Japan": needs rewording -- as written this says that the meteor shower deemed the session a failure.
  • "with the largest crashing in Mount Kurodake": largest what? Meteor?
  • "determines the Prophetess to be normal": what does this mean?

The article needs copyediting before it can pass GA. Some more examples: "a replacement was need"; "partnered up"; and "rapidly edited explosions". In addition to copyediting for this kind of basic error, it also needs a higher-level copyedit to assemble the material in a readable way. The prose style is almost all short sentences that are non sequiturs; the bar for prose at GA only requires it to be clear, not confusing, and grammatically correct, but this is below that level. The first paragraph of the "Special effects" section is a good example of the problem; if you can get someone else to copyedit it I would point them at that paragraph as an example of what needs fixing. Unfortunately I think this is too far from meeting the criteria for GA to fix while under review, so I am failing it. Mike Christie (talk - contribs - library) 21:23, 20 August 2022 (UTC)[reply]