Talk:George Gribble (RAF officer)/GA1
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Reviewer: Peacemaker67 (talk · contribs) 08:36, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
This looks good. A few points:
- the lead could be expanded a little more, promotions, split the victories by campaign, a bit more about his death
- suggest odd→occasional
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- suggest "It then began to fly sorties over France"
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- Luftwaffe is in most English dictionaries, so doesn't qualify for MOS:FOREIGN italicisation
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- "The next day" after which date?
- I had the sentences in the wrong order - have reversed so now is clear what next day refers to. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- maybe state where Rochford and Manston are
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- "one of 30 that were intercepted"
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- "In a subsequent patrol later in the day" is a bit tautological
- Rephrased. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- Bf 19s
- Whoops, fixed. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- Optional: I'd re-order the cites in numerical order ie [10][7]→[7][10]
- Reordered, it is my preference to have the numerical order anyway. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- who presented his DFC?
- Added detail. Zawed (talk) 10:47, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- including the navigation box for the British World War II flying aces with 10+ aerial victories seems incongruous given he isn't one of them. Perhaps add a "See also" section with a link to List of World War II aces from the United Kingdom?
- Done. Zawed (talk) 10:25, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
That's it, placing on hold for the above to be addressed. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 09:01, 23 June 2022 (UTC)
- This article is well-written, verifiable using reliable sources, covers the subject well, is neutral and stable, contains no plagiarism, and is illustrated by an image with an appropriate caption. Passing. Peacemaker67 (click to talk to me) 13:10, 24 June 2022 (UTC)
- @Peacemaker67: Thanks PM, I was going to come back and do a little more on the lead. Anyhoo, hope you are well, it seems like it has been a while since we last crossed paths. Cheers, Zawed (talk) 00:40, 25 June 2022 (UTC)