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Talk:French ironclad Furieux/GA1

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Reviewer: Harrias (talk · contribs) 14:02, 5 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]


I'll take a look at this. Harrias talk 14:02, 5 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Design
  • "..identical to Tonnerre, though with a slightly longer and narrower hull." Surely this is a contradiction? "near-identical" maybe?
    • Done
  • "..the placement of the gun aft required.." Is this right? It feels like it should be "the aft gun"?
    • What I was getting at was moving one of the guns from the forward turret to a position aft - see if how I reworded it makes more sense
  • "She had an armor deck that was 91 mm (3.6 in) that was connected to the top.." I think the second "that was" could be removed and replaced with a comma?
    • Done
  • In the first part of this section, the gun measurements are given in cm, but in the modifications, it switches to mm, which I found a little confusing.
    • All fixed - I have a habit of using cm from all the German ships I've done, but the French designated their guns in mm.
Service history
  • "That year, she took part in a mobilization exercise in 1888.." Remove "in 1888".
    • Done
  • "..visiting the ports on Lisbon, Portugal.." "of", not "on".
    • Good catch
  • "..Lisbon, Portugal, Ferrol, Vigo, and Villagarcia, Spain, Cadiz, Morocco, and Tangiers, French Algeria." I'm confused by the format of this; mainly the placement of Cadiz, which is in Spain, after Spain, implying that it is in Morocco?
    • Whoops, fixed
  • "Tenders for the boilers were solicited in June 1898 and Belleville models being selected, to be manufactured by Indret." Replace "being" with "were".
    • Done
  • "..during which time trials of the new guns.." Can this be rephrased slightly? At first I misread it as "during which time trials of the new guns"!
    • Done
  • The image caption says "Furieux as a depot ship during World War I", but this doesn't appear in the main text, nor is it referenced.
    • Fixed
References
  • References are all to reliable sources, and are consistently formatted in an appropriate style.
Images
  • All images are appropriately tagged and captioned (other than noted above).
  • Consider adding alt text, but it isn't a GA requirement.

Nice work, as usual. Nothing major here. Harrias talk 20:37, 11 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks Harrias. Parsecboy (talk) 11:56, 12 March 2020 (UTC)[reply]
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