Talk:French destroyer Tartu (1931)/GA1
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Reviewer: Gog the Mild (talk · contribs) 22:39, 29 August 2019 (UTC)
On my list. Gog the Mild (talk) 22:39, 29 August 2019 (UTC)
- Should "the 5th Demi-Brigade of Mountain Infantry (5e Demi-Brigade de Chasseurs alpins)" have an upper case A in "alpins"?
- Not according to French-language sources that I used for other French DD articles
- "The 5th Scout Division returned to Toulon on 27 May in anticipation of the Italians joining the war as the Mediterranean Fleet was prepared to attack them." This makes it sound as if the Italians were joining the war because the Mediterranean Fleet was prepared to attack them.
- "After they declared war on 10 June" Could we specify "they"?
- "Damage assessments afterward revealed that little damage had been inflicted despite expending over 1,600 rounds of all calibers" Damage to the Italian MASs, the oil tanks, or Vado Ligure generally.
- "After the French surrender on 22 June, the Royal Navy attacked the ships in Mers-el-Kébir, French Algeria, on 3 July to prevent them from being turned over to the Germans; Tartu was one of the ships that rendezvoused with the ships from Oran, French Algeria, and escorted them to Toulon." I am struggling to spot the connection, if any, between the two parts of this sentence; and the relevance, if any, of the first part. Consider trimming and/or explaining a little further.
- See how it reads now. Thanks for the review.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:06, 3 September 2019 (UTC)
- That all looks good. I am passing now, but, could you have a look at my comment above in green, which you seem to have overlooked. Cheers. Gog the Mild (talk) 09:19, 4 September 2019 (UTC)
- See how it reads now. Thanks for the review.--Sturmvogel 66 (talk) 19:06, 3 September 2019 (UTC)
Good Article review progress box
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