Talk:Fredonian Rebellion

Initial comments on the article

Hi Karanacs, thanks for inviting me to have a look at this article.

• Lead

I don't think the lead is concise enough. It needs to be more simple and clear to convey to Reader the gist of what the rebellion was all about. I suggest changing the sentences so that they get away from detailed accounts and provide a simple overview instead.

The laws enacted by Mexico in reaction to the Fredonian Rebellion to prevent Anglo-American immigration were the direct precursor to the Texas Revolution. This is a significant notable effect that should be mentioned in the last sentence of the lead.

• Background

• First paragraph - I looked up the reference and read the page cited to the first paragraph. Although it is accurate, I think the Wikipedia version is a more complicated explanation than the original source cited. Ericson's explanation has been clouded instead of reiterated in a simple easy to understand kind of way. Some key points omitted by Wikipedia in this article are an explanation of how Mexico had just won independence from Spain and followed the example of the US by dividing their territories up into States, one of which was Coahuila y tejas - further divided into municipalities, one of which was Nacogdoches.
  • I've reworded this to make more sense. Karanacs (talk) 00:22, 20 August 2009 (UTC)
• Part of writing an FA is to make the article catch Reader's attention. There is much in the main source that is omitted by the article, the "catchy" interesting stuff. On page 43, Ericson notes that Nacogdoches was a noted "gamblers heaven", a "home for crooks of various kinds", and in 1826 at the start of the Fredonian R, it was "one of the principal 'gateways' for Anglo-Americans entering Texas" and "a staging point for adventurers". I think the article would be better if it included these colorful and interesting facts that give Reader perspective and insight into what the area was like prior to the start of the Rebellion.
  • That information isn't really relevant to the article. The rebellion was staged by different people, not these. Karanacs (talk) 00:22, 20 August 2009 (UTC)
• I don't like the verbal description of Nacogdoches location sitting in Background all alone. There is a pretty good picture that could be used to enhance that section here:

• Sources

• I think the article could be further enhanced by adding this univerisity press book as a source [1]. See especially page 64 which as some info that I think has not been covered in the Wikipedia article.

• The article mentions involvement of Cherokee indians but there were other tribes of Native Americans as well that this source discusses.

• I took a look at the MSN Encarta article [2] to see how it compared with this article. There is a point made in the MSN article that I do not find in the Wikipedia article. Specifically, it relates to the only armed conflict occured on Jan 4 1827 where the Fredonians routed a force of about 60 men, mostly Mexicans, sent to capture the Fredonian garrison. The Native Americans together with the Fredonians routed these men. The Wikipedia article makes no mention of this armed conflict.

OK, that's all I can offer you right now. I will try to help as much as I can especially since you have so often spent your time helping me fine tune my articles. I hope you don't expect my comments to be as good as yours but I am trying to be as helpful as I can by giving you my honest impression of the article's present needs. Thanks for inviting me. NancyHeise ^talk 18:30, 22 May 2009 (UTC)

Just a note that I've reexamined all my sources (including the Handbook of Texas [3]) and haven't found any mention of a January 4 conflict. I found a mention in a 1903 book, bumt other contemporary books don't include that. Without further verification, I'm not ready to include that information. Karanacs (talk) 21:03, 12 August 2009 (UTC)

Dates

"The Fredonian Rebellion (December 21, 1827 – January 31, 1827) was the first attempt . . . " [emphasis mine]

Fixy fixy? —Preceding unsigned comment added by 128.196.20.204 (talk) 23:49, 9 November 2010 (UTC)

Mexico country

"Mexico" is wikilinkled to the present-day country. Wouldn't First Mexican Republic which existed 1824–1835 be more appropriate as the target here? Also, shouldn't the name be "United Mexican States" rather than "Mexico" --LukeSurl ^t c 10:22, 21 December 2021 (UTC)