Talk:Frank Lorenzo/GA1

GA Review

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: Jezhotwells (talk) 14:50, 9 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS):
~~I feel that an info box , using the Template:Infobox person should be provided at the head of the article.~~

There are a large number of one sentence paragraphs.

Amid the negative publicity that followed, Barbara Walters dubbed Lorenzo "probably the most hated man in America" in a 1989 interview, which he denied, blaming the unions for the bad press. Unclear grammar

The Lead does not adequately summarize the article. Please read WP:LEAD and apply those guidelines.

From 1972 to 1978, Lorenzo and his management team turned a $6.3 million loss on $63 million in revenue into a $13.2 million profit on $158 million in revenue. How?

TIA's attempted takeover of the much larger National "surprised a lot of people". Why?

~~Although mostly well written the prose is choppy and somewhat disconnected. Needs work to make a smooth flowing narrative, whilct remaining encyclopedic in tone.~~
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
References check out OK
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
There is a lot of coverage of the individual companies which Lorenzo has been involved with, much of this material would be better in the company articles rather than here. Remain focussed on the article subject.

Little or no coverage of his life outside of business.
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:
On hold for seven days. Please comment here as I have watchlisted this page. Jezhotwells (talk) 15:44, 9 November 2009 (UTC). Hold extended for three more days (19 Nov). Jezhotwells (talk) 13:44, 16 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

Update

I think I covered most of the points above; would appreciate another look at it and any further comments. Thanks! Frank | talk 03:25, 18 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

I have had a long hard look at this and I feel that the main problems is this: Is this artcile about Frank Lorenzo or about Jet Capital / Texas Air /Eastern or Continenetal? At persent large parts of the article make no direct reference to Lorenzo, but are about the machinations of various company boards, in which Lorenzo undoubtedly played a part. I would recommend that you havee a long hard think about this. You may well have material for two or more articles here on aspects of the US airline business. I am not able to list this as a good article at present as the article is not sufficiently focussed on the purported subject, Frank Lorenzo. Jezhotwells (talk) 10:16, 18 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]

A fair point; I would say in response that the whole reason for Lorenzo's notability is his single-minded focus on the machinations of the airline industry for over 20 years. I can't say whether or not he pursued other interests in that time, but they certainly don't appear to be reported. His polarizing effect on companies, especially with respect to unionization and cost-cutting, are still legendary. Frank | talk 13:41, 18 November 2009 (UTC)[reply]