Talk:Frank Callan

Frank Callan has been listed as one of the Sports and recreation good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: September 30, 2024. (Reviewed version).

Biography

This article is within the scope of WikiProject Biography, a collaborative effort to create, develop and organize Wikipedia's articles about people. All interested editors are invited to join the project and contribute to the discussion. For instructions on how to use this banner, please refer to the documentation.BiographyWikipedia:WikiProject BiographyTemplate:WikiProject Biographybiography articles

Snooker Low‑importance

	This article is within the scope of WikiProject Snooker, a collaborative effort to improve the coverage of snooker on Wikipedia. If you would like to participate, please visit the project page, where you can join the discussion and see a list of open tasks.SnookerWikipedia:WikiProject SnookerTemplate:WikiProject SnookerSnooker articles
Low	This article has been rated as Low-importance on the importance scale.
	An editor has requested that an image or photograph be added to this article.

GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Frank Callan/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Nominator: BennyOnTheLoose (talk · contribs) 01:23, 28 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Reviewer: EnthusiastWorld37 (talk · contribs) 13:05, 28 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Shall review EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 13:05, 28 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

"and argued that technique should be tailored to players." - techniques
"Callan was acknowledged as the leading snooker coach." - please state by whom

Early life and career

"Callan won the Fleetwood and District Amateur Snooker Championship in 1950. It was the first time he had entered the competition." - I believe that these two sentences could be merged together by shortening and rewording the second
"receiving 21 points start in each frame," - receiving a 21-point start in
"His most notable tournament win" - how about victory?

Coaching

The first mention of the term cue could do with being wikilinked to cue stick
"He was renowned" - attribution please
"with a players technique" - player's
I might be wrong but I believe that Commonwealth Club in the prose is the club mentioned in Blackpool Mecca. If that is the case, it can be wikilinked to there

Good spot - I found this BBC article that confirms it.

The word tables in the sentence "Callan was impressed that Davis was researching the quality of the various tables at the club before playing in a competition there" can be wikilinked to Billiard table
"and Parrot was champion in 1991." - typographical error denoted in bold
"However, a few years laterGriffiths reduced his engagement with Callan," - How many years later exactly? Do we know?

According to Griffiths' autobiography, he started working with Callan in 1985 (p.119); the book was published in 1989 and Griffiths wrote "I have not been going to see Frank quite so much in the past year or so." (p.121)

"like the ideal length" - such as
"deal length for Griffith's cue action." - Griffiths's
"After winning the UK title, Mountjoy said "Without Frank Callan, I would be nothing" - this sentence is missing a full stop

I added punctuation (after the quote mark, as there is a comma after "nothing" in the original)

"rather than tailored approach" - rather than a

Reference

The reference with the title "Crucible champions: Every World Snooker Championship winner profiled including Alex Higgins, Ronnie O'Sullivan and Stephen Hendry" is missing the access date

That is what I found on the first pass. On hold EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 18:32, 28 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]

Many thanks, EnthusiastWorld37. I've amended the article as per your comments above. Please et me know if anything else is needed. Regards, BennyOnTheLoose (talk) 22:38, 29 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]
- @BennyOnTheLoose: Am satisfied with the changes. The article can be promoted to GA status EnthusiastWorld37 (talk) 19:57, 30 September 2024 (UTC)[reply]