Talk:Football Glory/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 20:26, 6 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

"One (against an..." this feels awkward. I would say it's a one- or two-player game and then describe how each mode works. Perhaps even just leave it as one/two player for the lead.
Simplified. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"on varying pitches" perhaps "various" unless you mean the pitch itself changes.
Simplified. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"with London-based " no need to link London.
Done. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
Was the successor game not notable enough for an article?
Doubtful; I found just one review and overall coverage is scarce. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"They play with" Perhaps more like "Clubs available for selection by the players are from..." or similar?
Reworded. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"National teams star in..." feature rather than star.
Reworded. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"and English League" -> "English Football League"
Done. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"the MS-DOS port" link port.
Done. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"refereeing decision, they can chase down and argue with the referee" link referee for "refereeing" not wait until "referee".
Done. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"from London. He talked with Croteam all day" don't link London and I doubt it was "all day"...
The source says "all day", albeit a direct quote from Holmes. The implication is that they worked much longer per day than usual, causing Holmes's odd 50/10 sleep rhythm. Reworded. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
"about five-a-side football"" featuring?
Done. IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
If you use access dates, do it consistently.
Access dates are set for those sources that I could actually access. I never really 'accessed' the Croteam pages as they have been dead for decades; I only ever accessed the archives. Should I still add access dates for these? IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]
No, it's fine I understand your approach. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 08:00, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

A very nice article, good work. I'll put it on hold while these points are discussed. Cheers. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 20:18, 8 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

@The Rambling Man: Thanks for the review. I made some changes and left individual comments above. Regards, IceWelder [✉] 00:05, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]

All good, happy to promote this, nice work. The Rambling Man (Stay alert! Control the virus! Save lives!!!!) 08:00, 9 May 2021 (UTC)[reply]