Talk:First generation of video game consoles/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Gamingforfun365 (talk · contribs) 00:57, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

After making copyedits and tagging areas for cleanup, I have decided to give this article a review. From what I have already seen, the article is not ready to be promoted, and I find the C-class assessment of the article to be appropriate. However, I think it can be readily improved within a week, and I have comments about the article below:

"There were 685 home video game consoles known to have been released..." I could not find a source detailing every single home console released in the generation, nor can I find one giving the number. The number seems to be interdependent on the number of entries documented in List of first generation home video game consoles, and if none of us can even know how many such consoles released, it might be better to just remove the claim.

Done I've re-worded and sourced. CrimsonFox ^talk 09:32, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

If the contents are already cited in the body, there is no need to cite them again in the lead.

Done Think this is done now. CrimsonFox ^talk 09:32, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Some parts of the article are noticeably missing reliable sources. You have a handful of areas tagged "citation needed" or the like, and some of the technical information under Comparison (e.g. media, accessories, launch prices, models) is not reliably sourced anywhere else in the article.
"This section [Home systems] lists the most popular." One of the listed consoles is the BSS 01, which the section says was unpopular and sold only about 1,000 units. I am not convinced that the BSS 01 was one of the most popular home consoles the section claims it to be, not to mention that it is a very obscure console.

Per the rewording to "notable" I think this is suitable now. I do believe because of the incorporation into the education culture and being the only one to be developed there it does make it notable. CrimsonFox ^talk 09:32, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Done

At this point, it is too soon to promote the article, and I am still checking the sources as well as looking for anything containing mistakes or needing expansion. In the meantime, I encourage you to look at my comments and address the issues, and I should get this review done by next Sunday UTC. Reviewing... ~~Gamingforfun~~³⁶⁵ 00:57, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you! I look forward to it. Found this one a bit harder so it's nice to have some fresh eyes on it. CrimsonFox ^talk 09:32, 15 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

New comments

First review

Some more comments I have while reviewing it.

This may be a good source for the sales of the TV Tennis Electrotennis. It is in Japanese, but it comes from the Kyoto University, and if translators are correct, the TV Tennis sold about 20,000 units. There is also talk about Epoch entering a licensing agreement with Magnavox.
- Thanks Done CrimsonFox ^talk 22:05, 22 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
If I were you, I would write under History about the evolving technology used by the consoles, in particular regarding the graphics, the audio, and the architecture of the consoles. I might also consolidate and condense the second and third paragraphs in the lead by cutting down the verbosity, making it less technical, etc. Also in the lead, I would put more emphasis on the generation's defining characteristics (e.g. adding a mention of the handheld systems all being dedicated consoles) and move or merge the architecture information into History or a (sub)section about a console.
- Done CrimsonFox ^talk 20:06, 7 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Something about the video game crash of 1977. The lead says it, along with the start of the second generation, effectively lead to the end of the first generation. It may be appropriate to discuss the crash and its effects on the first generation under History, as well as a generalized timeline of companies gradually or suddenly pulling out of the market.
- The more I look into this, the more I'm not sure it happened (or at least was a "crash") so I've removed the specific mention of it. I think the mention of the overabundance of clones and companies leaving is still worth mentioning though so I'll try to incorporate it into the history section. CrimsonFox ^talk 22:05, 22 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
  - Done CrimsonFox ^talk 21:57, 24 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
I see an entry in the Comparison table about the Binatone TV Master series. Is the British console line by any chance popular or noteworthy enough to write a subsection about like the other listed home systems? Probably. One source describes it as having been mass-produced, yet from what I have seen, surprisingly, the sources covering the subject are scarce.
And of course, there are cleanup tags to address.

As an update, I am halfway finished with this review, and the article is clearly looking better. I notice an improvement in the quality of references, as well as the removal of the BSS 01 subsection for being "about 100 rungs down the ladder on importance," as another editor put it, which frankly was what I was thinking. With the reference quality improved, I am currently reading the contents of the article and the sources, while also expecting some changes to the article along the way, and as said last time, I hope to be done by next Sunday UTC. Reviewing... ~~Gamingforfun~~³⁶⁵ 20:50, 18 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Pinging Crimsonfox to let them know about this updated review. Also, I found a publication about the history of Nintendo before the Famicom. Particularly useful are pages 92 and 93, which contain information about the Color TV-Game series. According to the book and Internet translators, it appears the total sales are 1.36 million—close to the 1.5 million figure the article claims the series sold. This does not include the sales of the Computer TV-Game, which sold very low probably because of the high price of ¥48,000 (equivalent to ¥65,347 in 2019). ~~Gamingforfun~~³⁶⁵ 23:15, 19 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

Sorry, I had seen it but just haven't had the time to reply yet. It all looks reasonable and I think would be a good addition to the article. Thanks for the sources, I believe Indrian also has a source for the figure too so we should be good now. I'll get working! CrimsonFox ^talk 08:08, 20 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Crimsonfox: If it helps, I can pause reviewing the article and allow up to a week for the changes to occur. I have written down a lot of suggestions, and I would not like to make the list overwhelming. From what I have seen, I do have several more comments:

@Gamingforfun365: I'll need the week to make the changes but I don't mind if you continue to note down comments, if you think it needs addressing then I'm happy for it to be noted. CrimsonFox ^talk 11:52, 22 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

"It was also late in this generation that Nintendo entered the video game console market for the first time." This does not appear anywhere in the article other than the lead. I suggest editing the "Color TV-Game Series" and write how they first entered the market.
- It's actually noted in the Odyssey section. I've reworded the lead to reflect this and reworded the Nintendo involvement sections in both the Odyssey and Color-TV Game series sections to read better. CrimsonFox ^talk 12:56, 22 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]
Speaking of series, is that word really a part of the names of the console series. If not, per MOS:HEAD, the subsections should have series lowercased to form Odyssey series, Coleco Telstar series, and Color TV-Game series. Also, I would not suppose that the "Handheld Games" in "Mattel Handheld Games" should be capitalized, should it?
- Done
I am reading History, and when I take the paragraph about Atari and its Pong game, all that the adjacent screenshot serves to tell the readers is what the debut version of Pong looked like. I fail to find any relation between that and the first generation of video game consoles. If I were you, I would edit the captions to make it say that the consoles were often clones of Pong. I would then move it under "Home systems" or next to the nonexistent paragraph about the market saturation and the crash of 1977.
- Done CrimsonFox ^talk 22:05, 22 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

~~Gamingforfun~~³⁶⁵ 23:29, 21 September 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Crimsonfox: I have left this article alone for changes to be made and for issues to be fixed, and from the looks of it I see that the article is noticeably different from when I first reviewed it, which is also a good thing. I will review this article again and check for any minor issues. I do not think that I will find anything serious that needs fixing, so expect this process to go a little faster than the previous. Also expect me to have been done by next Sunday. GaɱingFørFuɲ³⁶⁵ 23:30, 13 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Gamingforfun365: Thanks, I appreciate the effort you're putting in for the review. CrimsonFox ^talk 09:02, 14 October 2019 (UTC)[reply]

@Gamingforfun365: I think I've addressed everything you made note of (just chasing a page number for the WSJ reference). I decided to remove the Binatone information, I can't see anything that makes it notable for the generation. It gets a few mentions but nothing that makes it stand out. CrimsonFox ^talk 22:24, 10 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I am letting you know that I have almost finished verifying this article and completing the review. I do apologize for the lack of motivation and energy put into the review when I had all the spare time; there is no reason to procrastinate. I would just like to point out that as I am reviewing the article, it can become awkward how the contents are sourced. By that, I mean that the passages that are directly sourced may not quite appear in those sources, but rather in indirect citations adjacent to the statements. I am not in the mood to give an example, as it is not significantly important and I am still able to easily verify the contents. Another thing concerns the release date of the Magnavox Odyssey. Some sources claim that it was released in August 1972, but others insist that the month was actually September. According to Polygon, "We don’t know exactly when Odyssey launched, except that it was in the second half of 1972." Here on the Wikipedia article, we have two contradictory claims where one says that the month was August and the other September. What the sources unanimously say is that the world's first console was released in the second half of 1972. For that, it may be a good idea to remove the risk of being inaccurate by making the date less precise, right? Anyway, given that you (and others) readily address shortcomings as I spot them, I will probably pass this article later today or tomorrow. GaɱingFørFuɲ³⁶⁵ 00:31, 15 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]

I have decided to promote the article to GA. It has been thoroughly checked since I have started the review, and I believe it covers all the important points and events of the first generation of video game consoles. However, I would like to note that I had to remove one following unsourced claim in order to pass the article:

The first generation handheld electronic game market existed from 1977 to around 1981.^{[citation needed]}

Readers already have an idea when and how long the generation of handheld systems had lasted, so I do not feel that it is terribly important. However, I do think that it helps to be more precise on describing that market's generation and not overgeneralize the facts, so you can add it back in once you find a source that confirms the claim. Well done, Crimsonfox and Indrian! Approved GaɱingFørFuɲ³⁶⁵ 01:55, 29 November 2019 (UTC)[reply]