Talk:Eli Parsons Royce/GA1
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Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 09:01, 4 October 2020 (UTC)
Taking this review for the GAN October 2020 Backlog Drive. MWright96 (talk) 09:01, 4 October 2020 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- Pass/Fail:
Infobox
[edit]- Royce's occupation should begin with a capital letter
Lead
[edit]- Clarify Royce was American in the first sentence
- "and considered the founder of Escanaba." - and is considered
Early life
[edit]- "Royce was born in Clinton, New York, November 29, 1820." - on November 29
- "Phinehas Royce, was a Quaker and born in Massachusetts." - Perhaps make the text in bold a little shorter like was a Massachusetts-born Quaker?
- I think the second and third sentences can be merged together
- "Royce is their fourth son." - shouldn't it be was?
Career
[edit]- Consider merging the first two sentences of the first paragraph
- Use the convert template on the miles measurements
- "like being able" - such as
- "After some time," - how much time exactly?
- "He also taught school for two years." - I'm not sure what is meant by this sentence. Does it mean he taught at a particular school for this period?
- "He got various jobs in Chicago then from 1840 - 1842." - from 1840 to 1842.
- "and worked with him." - what sort of work did Royce do with the Mayor of Chicago?
- "He later returned in the summer of 1849" - per MOS:SEASONS, using seasons to refer to a particular time of the year is not recommended
- "built west to the" - of the
- "and married to Sarah J. Barras," - a word is missing between "and" and "married"
- "There he studied law" - did Royce study law at a particular institution?
- Upper Peninsula is linked twice
- "and is considered the founder" - considered by whom?
Death
[edit]- "Royce died May 26, 1912, at the age of 91." - died on May 26,
- Detroit Free Press states he died on the morning of May 26, 1912 from old age
References
[edit]- References 6 and 13 are duplicates; only one is needed
- The hyphen in the title of Reference 12 can be replaced by an en dash (–) per MOS:DASH
Will put the review on hold to allow the nominator to address or query the points raised above. MWright96 (talk) 10:18, 4 October 2020 (UTC)
- Working on the issues brought up. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:25, 4 October 2020 (UTC)
- Done all issues above. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:36, 6 October 2020 (UTC)
- @MWright96: All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 10:36, 6 October 2020 (UTC)
- @Doug Coldwell: Now promoting to GA class. MWright96 (talk) 12:17, 6 October 2020 (UTC)