Talk:Edwin Flack/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: The Rambling Man (talk · contribs) 16:47, 1 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments

Lead is a little slim for an article of this size.
Would add non-breaking spaces between 800/1500 and metres throughout. --I never understood non-breaking spaces very well. I think I did as requested but not sure.
No need to link common terms like "accountancy". Done
"Davey, Flack & Co.[4][2]" order those refs. Done
Avoid single-sentence paras. Done except for when I felt the previous paragraphs were unrelated
" middle distance and distance running " do you mean "long" there, i.e. "middle and long distance running"? Done
No need to capitalise C in colonies. Done
"was 2nd in" second. Done
"A keen athlete in Victoria," I think given the preceding paragraphs, this doesn't need to be stated. Done
"intent on attending the coming inaugural Olympics while in the city of New York" I don't understand this. Done
"880 yards (804.67m)" these conversions are not necessary (and not done the first time round in any case). Done
"W Bennett " -> "W. Bennett" Done
", in the marathon, " with rather than in. Done
" Olympics He lost in" missing full stop. Done
" Australian postage stamp in " postage stamp is an easter egg link. -- Link removed
Avoid SHOUTING in ref titles. Done
Avoid spaced hyphens in ref titles, they should be spaced en-dashes. Done
Ext link, spell out what ADB means. Done
Could add "people from Islington" as a category. Done

That's it for a first run. I'll put it on hold while we go over the details. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 08:51, 2 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]

The changes you've made are great. The lead is still too slim though. The Rambling Man (Staying alive since 2005!) 07:57, 3 April 2020 (UTC)[reply]