Talk:Eddie Zosky/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 20:53, 11 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I will review this article within the next few days. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 20:53, 11 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Before I do the prose, here are some referencing issues:

Ref #2's a deadlink, as is the baseball prospectus ext. link. DONE. Fixed the dead link by removing it.
Refs with urls should have accessdates added in DONE
A lot of refs don't have publisher info, namely the B-R ones. Those should include the following: |work=Baseball-Reference.com|publisher=Sports Reference, LLC| DONE

I'll do the prose review either Sunday or Monday, though on a skim read I can already see a few things to change. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 05:34, 16 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Here are the rest of the issues, on top of the above:

"Edward James Zosky (born February 10, 1968) is a Jewish-American former shortstop " you can just say American; religion isn't added into first sentences. DONE
Early life sentences can be combined. Also, any info on him playing high school baseball? There might be something for a sentence or two.Nothing on high school baseball career. Otherwise, fixed.
"In May, 1988" no comma needed unless a day's there DONE
"As well, Zosky was" strange beginning to a sentence, reword. DONE
For terms like Single-A and Double-A, link to the appropriate section of minor league baseball. you and I know what those mean, many probably don't. DONE
"tying William Suero for the team lead in triples" how many? DONE
"plating John Olerud and Candy Maldonado on the same play." just say scoring; plating's a bit jargony even for me. DONE
", ahead of Rico Brogna (87th), Doug Glanville (93rd) and Kevin Young (100th)." unlike the first time, adding in the names here doesn't really do much, i'd just remove them. DONE
"(which he hit off of Jose Mesa on September 14—exactly one year after his first extra-base hit, which was also a triple[35])" I thought the triple was off Bob Welch as was written in the earlier section; now I'm confused. ~~I'm confused too. Let me check that.~~ It just notes that his triple came a year after his first EXBH - it doesn't say that it came off the same pitcher.
"January, 1993" no comma DONE
Alex Gonzalez currently links to a disambiguation page, as does mononucleosis. Alex Gonzalez fixed. I don't know which mononucleosis Zosky had (the article does not specify) so I'll de-wikify that.
"He spent most of the season with the Orioles' Triple-A International League affiliate the" comma after affiliate. same for the next sentence. DONE
I'm pretty sure free agent/free agency is not supposed to be hyphenated. All those will need to be fixed. It can go either way, but I fixed it.
"offering him also" also offering him sounds better. DONE
I don't really see a need for a summary; anything we need to know for a summary should be the lead. Moved summary info into lede.
In the external links, the second b-r one is a duplicate, and fangraphs and cube can be merged into the first row of links. DONE

Overall, there's a lot to do, but it can still be turned into a good article. I'll put it on hold for five days. If everything's fixed, I'll pass the article as a GA. If not, I'll fail it. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 04:04, 19 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I did a copyvio check (showed up on a CCI) and this is clean, so I'll give one more read through, and if it's good, I'll pass the article. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 05:48, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Here are my comments on a second read:

"he matriculated into Fresno State University," we could just say he attended. granted, matriculation is correct, so if you prefer it as is then it can stay as such. DONE
"The next school to do it was Rice University in 2004, who had pitchers Philip Humber, Jeff Niemann and Wade Townsend drafted in the first round." While interesting, it's not really relevant to the article and could just be removed. DONE
"However, citing poor performances by his current shortstops, Double-A manager Barry Foote had Zosky start with the Southern League Knoxville Blue Jays" citation preferred here since we're noting something the manager said here. DONE
"against the Baltimore Orioles replacing shortstop Manuel Lee," he's already linked above so he doesn't need to be again. DONE
"However, later than month" that month DONE
The Orioles/Giants sections are short enough that you can combine them like the Pirates/Astros one. DONE
Has he been doing anything since retirement from baseball? I doubt anything's in the news about that and there will be nothing to add, but have to ask nonetheless. I looked, though I could not find anything.

Most of this is nitpicking, so the article is almost there. Article remains on hold, and I'll pass it once these issues are fixed. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 06:05, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Everything looks good now, so I'll pass the article as a GA. Wizardman _{Operation Big Bear} 16:41, 22 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Yay! Thanks! Alex (talk) 19:30, 24 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]