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Talk:Dyson Heppell

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Explanation of edit

[edit]

I couldn't fit all this an edit summary, so I'll explain it here. To be clear, this is what I'm talking about.

  • Don't need his full name in the caption, obviously if he is the left Carlisle is right so don't need to label him
  • Added Leongatha back as an original team (this wasn't one of your changes I don't think, just something I noticed)
  • No need to capitalise "defender" (I've changed it to half-back, but the point remains) unless it's at the start of a sentence
  • Re-wikilinked Leongatha Football Club, redlinks are a good thing, see WP:REDLINK
  • Changed publisher on the ref back to Essendon Football Club for consistency, added back the publication date (please don't remove that again)
  • Added "played" back, otherwise it implies that his time with Gippy Power was also part of when he began playing football
  • We've mentioned several different teams so need to clarify it was Power he was named captain of
  • Just generally not sure what your aversion to using his surname is, I've changed several of these back simply to change it up from using he/his all the time
  • Reverted your changes to references where you've used Fox Sports Pulse, they remove useful information such as when the article was published and who it was written by for no benefit
  • You don't really need to give a reference a name unless you plan on using it more than once, but that's not really a big deal
  • great --> good for the finals series, as noted he didn't play the best GF
  • "he slid" --> "Heppell did slide", just think this reads better in the context of the paragraph
  • Need to have "for 2011" right after the Rising Star nom, otherwise it implies he received the first ever one
  • Don't need to link AFL Rising Star twice, especially not in the same paragraph
  • Changed "bombers" back to "Essendon", as well as the capitalisation problem it's just cleaner to use Essendon there, though in general using Bombers to add some variety is fine
  • Go back to mentioning the Crichton Medal by name and linking on first instance
  • "his brilliant young career" is a bit over the top, either cite a reliable source saying it or let his accomplishments speak for themselves
  • Removed the Rising Star succession box, it already has a navbox and you don't need both

In general my frustration on this article over the last little while is that you keep making many little changes without using edit summaries and seemingly without a willingness to discuss. As well as that, I'm not too sure why you're so keen on making edits to the paragraphs that are actually well referenced and decently written. They only cover his junior career and first season at AFL level, everything after that is a bit of a mess really and where the attention needs to go. There's nothing about him being the stand-in captain in Watson's absence for example, or even a mention of the drugs saga. Jenks24 (talk) 13:03, 4 August 2015 (UTC)[reply]