Talk:Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Boycool (talk) 15:32, 16 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Hello, I will be reviewing this article. --Boycool (talk) 15:32, 16 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

At first glance the article looks good enough. Let's look indepth and review it against the GA critera.

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Comments

Overall the article is well done, with just a few odd issues.

Lead

I found that the lead doesn't flow very well. Preferably, the first paragraph would look something like this:

"Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager" is the 24th episode of the seventh season of the American comedy television series The Office and the show's 150th episode overall. The episode was written by Justin Spitzer and directed by Troy Miller. It originally aired in the United States on May 12, 2011 on NBC. In the episode, Dwight (Rainn Wilson) becomes the interim regional manager, instituting a typically heavy-handed management style. Meanwhile, Gabe (Zach Woods) tries to win back Erin (Ellie Kemper), but Andy (Ed Helms) gets in his way. The episode also features guest appearances from Kathy Bates, Cody Horn and Michael Schur.

"twenty-fourth episode" --> "24th episode", per WP:ORDINAL
Move the writer and director credits up. The reference is not needed in the source.
"It originally aired on...in the United States." --> "It originally aired in the United States on..."
Move the sentence about guest stars to after the plot summary.

"The episode received positive reviews from critics". Add comma before "with"
Add "the" before "lead actor".
Add a comma after "Steve Carrell".
Change the last sentence from its current state to something along the lines of:

According to Nielsen Media Research, "Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager" drew an estimated 6.45 million viewers and earned a 3.3 rating/8% share among those aged 18–49, making it the second-lowest rated episode of the season after "Todd Packer".

Plot

"much to Jim's chagrin". Add comma before "as".
"The Pledge of Allegiance" --> "the Pledge of Allegiance"
- Remove the rest of the commas in this sentence.
Remove the links to Jim and John Krasinski. Move it up to his first mention.
"He attempts to bribe the office workers..." Who is he?
Put quotes around Shagadelic, baby
Who breaks down? Andy or Gabe?
Who confronts Andy?
Whose crying fit does he describe?
Who does not give a straight answer?
In the third paragraph, remove the comma after "Gabe".

Production

In the image caption, specify that her appearance was "In this episode"
The first two sentences of the section might be better combined to ""Dwight K. Schrute, (Acting) Manager" was the ninth episode of the series written by supervising producer Justin Spitzer, and the first directed by Troy Miller." Your choice.
"Spitzer originally called the episode" --> "Spitzer originally titled it"
"decided the title was not descriptive enough". Add comma before "so"
Add a comma before "before".
"Dwights role more" --> "Dwight's role better". Add apostrophe to Dwights; more --> better.
"He then decided" --> "Spitzer then decided"
Remove the apostrophe from "it's" in "it's current title".
Add a comma between "Mose Schrute" and "his first appearance".
"due to being" --> "due to his being"
"the first-66 second" --> "the first, 66-second"
"the second 77-second" --> "the second, 77-second"
"the third 86-second" --> "the third, 86-second"
"the fourth 49-second" --> "the fourth, 49-second"

Reviews

The quote in the quotebox seems to continue from a previous statement. Add an ellipsis (...) in place of "Last night, though,".
Link Alan Sepinwall in the prose.
"He mainly praised the return "The Dwight/Jim dynamic in fact, that I briefly rethought the idea of Dwight as long-term boss." and went on to praise the writers for only featuring Dwight as manager for one episode." This is a nonsensical statement. Change it to:

He mainly praised the return of "The Dwight/Jim dynamic", writing that he "briefly rethought the idea of Dwight as long-term boss", and went on to praise the writers for featuring Dwight as manager for only one episode.

10 > 9, so change "tenth episode of the seventh season, "China"" to "10th episode..."
Add a comma between "performance" and "writing".

Other

This is not required, but a screenshot would really jazz up the article.

I will place the article on hold for seven days, though I doubt this will take long. Good luck. --Boycool (talk) 16:20, 16 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I believe I am finished NoD'ohnuts (talk) 19:32, 16 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Yes, I do believe you are. Congratulations. That's a pass! --Boycool (talk) 19:40, 16 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'm sorry but the episode is still listed as a nominee NoD'ohnuts (talk) 19:49, 18 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Hmm. I'll remove it manually. --Boycool (talk) 02:27, 19 July 2011 (UTC)[reply]