Talk:Duffy Lewis/GA1
Appearance
GA Review
[edit]GA toolbox |
---|
Reviewing |
Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch
Reviewer: GhostRiver (talk · contribs) 19:18, 3 January 2022 (UTC)
Hello! I'll be taking a look at this article for the January 2022 GAN backlog drive. If you haven't already signed up, please feel free to join in! Although QPQ is not required, if you're feeling generous, I also have a list of GA nominations of my own right here.
Good Article review progress box
|
Infobox and lede
[edit]- Add (MLB) after "Major League Baseball", since the abbreviation is used later in the lede
- Link the three WS years to their respective article
- Done – Muboshgu (talk) 22:19, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
Early life
[edit]- Good
Playing career
[edit]Early career
[edit]- "before he made his" → "before making his"
- "in the California State League" → "of the California State League"
- Both done – Muboshgu (talk) 22:20, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
Boston Red Sox
[edit]- "Along with Tris Speaker as the center fielder and Harry Hooper as the right fielder," → "Along with center fielder Tris Speaker and right fielder Harry Hooper"
- Sentence revised with a source that points out that Hooper moved from LF to RF for Duffy. – Muboshgu (talk) 22:43, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
- "during Ruth's major league career" → "during the latter's major league career"
- "Game 3 and Game 4" → "in both Games 3 and 4"
- Link San Francisco Bay Area
- "Red Sox' manager" → "Boston manager"
- All done – Muboshgu (talk) 22:43, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
Later playing career
[edit]- "Lewis with Dutch Leonard and Ernie Shore to" → "Lewis, along with Dutch Leonard and Ernie Shore, to"
- No comma after "He began to lose playing time in 1920"
- "He serves as" → "He served as"
- "performance of the team" → "team's performance"
- All done – Muboshgu (talk) 22:51, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
Career retrospective
[edit]- "among the best fielding outfielders" needs some kind of qualification, like in MLB/professional baseball history
- I am considering how to better qualify/contextualize this. – Muboshgu (talk) 01:22, 9 January 2022 (UTC)
- I can't find great sourcing to describe how good a fielder he was, so I think taking that out and sticking with his stats is the best approach. – Muboshgu (talk) 21:07, 10 January 2022 (UTC)
Duffy's Cliff
[edit]- Good
Later career
[edit]- The jump from the '29 market crash to coaching in '31 seems a little tenuous – any way to elaborate on what happened as an immediate result of the crash?
- The hint that I goofed is that the sentence on the '29 market crash was cited with the article written by Tim Murnane in 1912. Oops. The SABR bio makes the connection of losing his nestegg in the market crash and returning to baseball to make money, and this article from 1967 does as well. – Muboshgu (talk) 03:45, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
Later life
[edit]- I wouldn't mention his wife's death until after their relocation to Salem; it comes as a little bit of a shock that she dies at the end of one paragraph but is alive in the next
- Rearranged. – Muboshgu (talk) 22:56, 7 January 2022 (UTC)
References
[edit]- Good
General comments
[edit]- Images are all public domain and relevant
- No stability concerns in the revision history
- Earwig score looks good, highest result falls along WP:LIMITED lines.
Putting on hold to allow nominator to address comments. Please feel free to ping me with questions, and let me know when you're finished! — GhostRiver 20:43, 4 January 2022 (UTC)
- @GhostRiver:, I believe I've addressed everything. – Muboshgu (talk) 21:07, 10 January 2022 (UTC)
- Thank you for making those changes, particularly the more substantial ones! Passing now! — GhostRiver 22:41, 10 January 2022 (UTC)