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Talk:Donkey Kong Jr. Math/GA1

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Reviewer: J Milburn (talk) 13:27, 13 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, taking a read through.

  • "It was released in 1983 for the Family Computer" Delink year, specify Japan?
  • "It is the only game in the "Education Series" of NES games in North America." released in North America?
  • "It has been cited by educational video game developers; one Elizabeth Sweedy emphasized her desire to not make an education game like Donkey Kong Jr. Math." This seems a little out-of-place in the lead
  • "It has also received criticism from such publications as Eurogamer, GameSpot, and IGN, the latter calling it one of the worst Virtual Console games. It was the worst-selling game in the NES' launch library." Definitely worth including in the lead, but it could do with smoothing out a little.
  • I note File:Donkey Kong Jr Math box.png has been reduced in size- do you have any objection to me deleting the old version?
    I have a concern about this. What are the differences between the versions? Donkey Kong's appearance changes, and the bird/duck changes. Are these US/UK differences, or is this a fanmade box? Blake (Talk·Edits) 19:39, 13 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
    That's a good point. Could we perhaps source the cover to a reliable website? J Milburn (talk) 19:43, 13 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
  • "PAL regions" What does this mean?
  • Do we not know anything about the development? People invovled? Inspiration? That kind of thing?
  • "Donkey Kong Juniors" Not gonna be clear to non-gamers what this means
  • "For example, in the below image," Nooooo. Avoid self references.
  • Sorry, the gameplay isn't particularly clear. You start talking about maths puzzles, then you're suddenly talking about vines. Is this a platformer? Single screen? You move up and down collecting numbers? It's not very clear.
  • "received very negative reception" Redundancy
  • "Donkey Kong Jr.'s moves as well" lose 's?
  • "realistic educational video games like Donkey Kong Jr. Math" Monkeys chasing numbers is realistic? What?
  • "Donkey Kong Jr. Math was poorly received as an educational game, and has been compared to several other educational games." I get that you want to introduce the paragraph, splitting it into themes, but this line doesn't seem to do that very well.
  • "Siliconera's Spencer" What is "Siliconera"/who is "Spencer"?
  • "kids'" A little informal
  • The rationale on the screenshot could do with tightening
  • The references could do with some wikilinks, and remember that periodicals (LA Times, for instance) should be italicised
  • Is the Mario and Nintendo category not redundant to the Donkey Kong category?

This is a nicely researched article and the formatting isn't bad, it just lacks a couple of details and could do with a slight prose cleaning. J Milburn (talk) 19:02, 13 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I think that I have fixed most of the problems, save for people involved and the lead image problem. The image problem is indeed strange. - The New Age Retro Hippie used Ruler! Now, he can figure out the length of things easily. 22:07, 15 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Could you search around online for a reliable source which shows the game's cover, and then upload a low-res version over the top of the current one, updating the sourcing as appropriate? I can then delete the old ones, and we can call that problem resolved. J Milburn (talk) 22:17, 17 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
The image doesn't seem to appear on reliable sources; this is due in part to the fact the Wii Virtual Console re-release does not feature the box art at any point in selling the game. - The New Age Retro Hippie used Ruler! Now, he can figure out the length of things easily. 07:15, 18 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
However, in this not-quite-reliable web site, it shows the European cover: [1]
I say not-so-reliable because while they have been used as a source by reliable sources, it's not terribly frequently. However, they do seem to have a good structure, and the editor-in-chief appears to be reliable. In addition, the European box art would have multiple uses: where the current box art is not only confusing and without anything resembling a reliable source to apply to either one but also merely a zoom-in of an in-game screenshot, this one has a seemingly-reliable one and demonstrates the art style. - The New Age Retro Hippie used Ruler! Now, he can figure out the length of things easily. 09:48, 18 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Your call. In this case, I can't see any reason to clearly favour any of the covers. So long as it is sourced and low resolution, I have no objection. J Milburn (talk) 16:08, 20 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

What's the status of this review? No comments in a couple weeks. Wizardman Operation Big Bear 15:25, 8 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

I'm sorry, I've found myself very busy. I will look back into this ASAP. J Milburn (talk) 01:44, 9 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Was also a bit my fault, since I procrastinated. - The New Age Retro Hippie used Ruler! Now, he can figure out the length of things easily. 09:55, 17 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, I've given the article a quick copyedit and split some of the sections. I'm now happy to promote this- you've done a good job for such an odd little game. J Milburn (talk) 12:35, 11 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thank you for your contributions and compliments! - The New Age Retro Hippie used Ruler! Now, he can figure out the length of things easily. 09:55, 17 February 2011 (UTC)[reply]
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