Talk:Donald Trump (Last Week Tonight with John Oliver)/GA1
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GA Review
[edit]- The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made in a new section.
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Reviewer: Aoba47 (talk · contribs) 17:46, 27 May 2016 (UTC)
- Grabbing this for a review. Aoba47 (talk) 17:46, 27 May 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks! ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:43, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
Lead and infobox
[edit]- I would recommend that you expand the Lead to include more from the “Reception and aftermath” section. You include a brief mention about the segment’s popularity, but I would recommend putting in a little more.
- Include an alt for the image in the infobox
- Done . ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:44, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
Description
[edit]- Include an alt for all the images here.
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:45, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Is it really necessary to have two images in the “Make Donald Drumpf Again” section? It seems a little excessive. I would suggest you pick one of the two images that you think is the strongest and eliminate the other one. However, if there is a reason behind including both pictures, just let me know. This is more of a suggestion to think about than a strong requirement.
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:46, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- While discussing the segment, use present tense. So it should be “he calls Trump a ‘serial liar’” etc. Look back at your work with the Tobacco segment to see what I mean. A majority of the Description section (with some exceptions) should be in present tense.
- Better? ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:50, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Eliminate the comma after 2016 in the first sentence of the first paragraph
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:51, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Remove the comma after “saying” in the second sentence of the first paragraph
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:51, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Too many instances with the word “Oliver”. I would recommend you replace some instances with “he” to avoid repetition.
- Done. I think? ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:56, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Looks great to me! I just wanted to make sure there was some variety instead of relying too much on similar sentence constructions. Aoba47 (talk) 01:15, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- In the first paragraph of the “Make Donald Drumpf Again”, be careful about using too many quotes. Over two-thirds of the paragraph is quotes. Be careful about over-quoting.
- I paraphrased one of the quotes and removed a redundant bit about Oliver encouraging use of the name. The section still has quotes, but I think it flows and reads a little better now. Let me know if more work is needed here. ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:54, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
Reception and aftermath
[edit]- Include an alt for the image
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:57, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Remember to add a citation to the caption in the image if you are using a quote (“a greater purpose”)
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 00:57, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- For the first sentence of the third paragraph, say “Daniel Victor of The New York Times”. Keep the link to The New York Times obviously. Replaced “it stated” with “Victor stated”. Include the writer in the sentence on CNET as well.
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:57, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
Name change timing dispute
[edit]- Add an alt for the image
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Change “agree” to “agreed” and “disagree” to “disagreed”
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Change the last part of the first sentence to “on whether the family name as changed in the 17th century or 1885.” Keep the link to the 17th century.
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:06, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Include the writer’s name for Snopes.com
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Change “Some articles state” to “Some articles stated”
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Include the author’s name for the book "America's Obsessives: The Compulsive Energy That Built a Nation"
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Is there a reason why you didn’t include the name of the reporter from The Guardian?
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:05, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
Done with this section. Let me know if any of these concerns need to be addressed further. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:06, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Looks great! Aoba47 (talk) 01:15, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
References
[edit]- You do not need to put Keri Blakinger in all caps.
- Done. ---Another Believer (Talk) 01:07, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Otherwise, great work here! I am very impressed with the research put into this page.
Final comments
[edit]@Another Believer: @Epicgenius: Great job with this article! Let me know if you have any questions or comments about my review. Once my comments are addressed, this should be a quick and easy pass.
- @Another Believer: Thank you for your responses to my review. Once you finish addressing the last of my comments, I will give this a pass. Aoba47 (talk) 02:21, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- Thanks, no problem! Will return to the review again soon. ---Another Believer (Talk) 15:59, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- How are things looking? ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:58, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- It looks great; thank you for your quick responses to the review. ✓ Pass
- @Aoba47: Thanks for reviewing this article. It looks like the pass didn't go through, though. Could you please do the {{pass}} comment again, with a signature? That may fix the problem.
@Another Believer: Sorry I hadn't had the opportunity to clean up this article for GA standards, and thank you for your efforts to improve this article to GA standards.
To both of you, thanks again for both your work on this article. Kylo, Rey, & Finn Consortium (formerly epicgenius) (talk) 22:33, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- @Aoba47: Thanks for reviewing this article. It looks like the pass didn't go through, though. Could you please do the {{pass}} comment again, with a signature? That may fix the problem.
- It looks great; thank you for your quick responses to the review. ✓ Pass
- How are things looking? ---Another Believer (Talk) 17:58, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
- Thanks, no problem! Will return to the review again soon. ---Another Believer (Talk) 15:59, 28 May 2016 (UTC)
- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.