Talk:Digital: A Love Story/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: J Milburn (talk) 22:33, 8 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

File:DigitalALoveStoryTitle.png is uploaded under the NFCC, noting that the game is licensed under CC-BY-NC-SA, while File:Screenshot Digital - A Love Story 1.1.png is on Commons under CC-by-SA-3.0. What's going on there?

Someone else had uploaded it to Commons, so it was in the article already when I started. It shouldn't be there, due to the "NC". I've requested speedy deletion there; as soon as it's done I'll upload a local copy- it won't let me right now as it's a duplicate file.

"indie video game by Christine Love" I'm not sure video games are "by" people in the same way novels are

Fixed.

"1980's computer" Not sure that apostrophe is right...

Fixed.

"and the messages and online" and and

Fixed.

"Many of the messages sent by the player or the replies back to those messages have no effect on the game" or?

Fixed.

"through there of another board whose telephone number" Clumsy wording

Fixed.

"the Creeper and Reaper viruses" You link one- are these both real?

Yes, though they're both at the same (crummy) article. Noted that they're both real.

"The player finds Paris" Another AI, presumably?

Yes, sorry, dropped that mention last night and forgot to pull it forward to his next mention.

I'd put the discussion of awards won after the comments from reviewers, but before the sequel note. Also, I think the awards are worth mentioning in the lead.

Done and done.

"IndieGames's Tim. W.," What is IndieGames? Why should we care?

Noted.

"The writing and story of the game were especially praised by reviewers of the game" The game the game

Fixed.

"The A.V. Club, while grading" The A.V Club didn't, a writer did

Fixed.

"The A.V. Club, while grading the game as an "A", called the story "moving"." "While" almost implies a discontinuity between the grading and comments.

Fixed.

We have an article on Kieron Gillen

Huh. I've gotten so used to that not happening that I've stopped checking. Fixed.

Refs 3 and 13 (and others)- there's something odd about having the publisher and author the same...

True, dropped the publisher bit where it was self-published by Love

"Resolution Magazine" Definitely reliable? If it's also a hardcopy magazine, italics?

Reliable, edited and such, but it (was) an online-only "magazine", so no italics. (that reminds me, I need to run my link archive script since that website will definitely die in a few years.)

Same for GameSetWatch

Another daughter site for Gamasutra - also indiegames and Game Developer (magazine), all owned by UBM TechWeb/UBM plc (IndieGames is all indie, GSW is more retro-oriented with a splash of indie, Gamasutra itself is industry professional-oriented. Some overlap in writing staff, but not in these cases).

Prose is a little choppy in the lead- definitely the most important part, really needs to be engaging

Tried to make it better- not sure if I succeeded.

Generally a lovely little article. Easy on the eyes, answers all the questions, well formatted. J Milburn (talk) 22:53, 8 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks! Replied inline, but everything should be fixed except for the image, which just needs an admin at commons to kill the file. --Pres N 00:13, 9 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ok, if you're gonna upload some more NFC, it's worth asking yourself whether you need both the logo and the screenshot. When compared to other video games, the "cover" is not all that important to this one, especially when the design is so clearly similar to the screenshots. Also, you may want to take a look at the images on Don't take it personally, babe, it just ain't your story, which appear to have been uploaded with an improper license. J Milburn (talk) 11:11, 9 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Alright, image is done. I'll take care of DTIP,B,IJAYS as well. --Pres N 18:58, 11 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Cool. I'm now happy to promote- good work! J Milburn (talk) 19:16, 11 June 2011 (UTC)[reply]