Talk:Darker than Black: Gaiden/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Jaguar (talk · contribs) 21:02, 2 October 2021 (UTC)

I'll get to this tomorrow. ♦ jaguar 21:02, 2 October 2021 (UTC) @Jaguar: Thanks for the review. I'll to fix any issue you find. It was recently copyedited by Baffle gab1978 from the Guild so I hope prose is okay. Still, it's kinda one of my smallest nominations I ever made.Tintor2 (talk) 22:06, 2 October 2021 (UTC)

• "Hei notices Yin's alter ego on their way to Hong Kong,;" - stray comma
  • Done
• " suggests she use herself as a bait to attract" - 'a' is redundant
  • Done
• "Meanwhile, an unknown group ensures Izanami's awakening is stopped and seal Yin" - seal Yin into where? Some explanation would help clarify this sentence
  • Done
• "Original character designer Yuji Iwahara, anime character designer and chief animation director Takahiro Komori" - anime seems a bit redundant here, aren't they all anime designers to an extent?
  • Revised. Basically, when making an anime, there are two character designers. Iwahara is the original artist while Komori adapted his work for the animation.
• "Anime UK Network stated he gave the second season of Darker than Black a more favorable score" - broken sentence; how about A reviewer from Anime UK Network gave the second season of Darker than Black a more favorable score
  • Done.

That's all I have. This is a nice compact article, which boasts comprehensiveness and good sourcing. Once those minor nitpicks are out of the way I'll be happy to promote this! ♦ jaguar 22:34, 5 October 2021 (UTC)

@Jaguar: Revised all. Thanks for the review.Tintor2 (talk) 23:31, 5 October 2021 (UTC)

This is good to go. ♦ jaguar 23:53, 5 October 2021 (UTC)