Talk:Danganronpa: Unlimited Battle/GA1
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Reviewer: Cognissonance (talk · contribs) 06:04, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
Unlimited Battle! ..."ceased operations in November 2015..." Cognissonance (talk) 06:04, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
Lead
[edit]- "similarly to billiards" — Fix grammar: "as with billiards".
- Done
- "confined arena area" — Coincide with Gameplay: "confined arena-like area".
- Done
- "one noted that the game retained the style of the previous games in the series, however," — Improve flow: "one noted however that the game retained the style of the previous games in the series".
- Done
Gameplay
[edit]- Remove a repeated billiards link.
- Done
- "in a billiards-like fashion" — Minimize repetition: "like billiards".
- Done
- "After a certain number of turns had passed" — Minimize repetition: "With a certain number of turns passed".
- Done
- "As the player defeated enemies, the enemies would drop two types of items" — Simplify: "Defeated enemies would drop two types of items".
- Done
- "of the player's character" — Simplify: "of the player character".
- Well, "player character" makes it sound like it's the player's avatar or whatever - the character representing them, or the character they control - which doesn't seem to be the case with the characters in DR:UB. Anyway, changed it to "their characters".
Release and reception
[edit]- The section should be written in past tense.
- Done
- "found the game fun and requiring skill and strategy" — Clarify: "found the game fun, requiring skill and strategy".
- Done
- "why Spike Chunsoft would chose a game known for "story of entrapment and murder mystery" as a game for a touchscreen action game" — Fix grammar and clarify: "why Spike Chunsoft would choose a series known for "story of entrapment and murder mystery" to make a touchscreen action game".
- Done, but I went with "as the base for" rather than "to make".
- Write the prefixes A at B with variation.
- Done
Overall
[edit]- It is reasonably well written.
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): d (copyvio and plagiarism):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Overall: Ping me when you're done / have questions.
- Pass/Fail:
- @IDV: Cognissonance (talk) 15:01, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
- @Cognissonance: I believe I have fixed everything.--IDVtalk 15:24, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
- @IDV: Cognissonance (talk) 15:01, 28 October 2016 (UTC)
- Pass/Fail:
- It is reasonably well written.
- a (prose, spelling, and grammar): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
- Pass/Fail:
- @IDV: Good stuff. Cognissonance (talk) 15:42, 28 October 2016 (UTC)