Talk:Curve-billed thrasher/GA1
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Reviewer: Sasata (talk · contribs) 09:22, 14 June 2014 (UTC)
I'll review this article. Will have comments up in a few days. Sasata (talk) 09:22, 14 June 2014 (UTC)
- Ok, my preliminary impression is that the prose needs quite a bit of work. I've left a starter list of issues below, and will be back with more when these are addressed. Sasata (talk) 06:27, 20 June 2014 (UTC)
- The lead is pretty small and does not currently summarize the article adequately. I think it needs some info from the Description and Breeding sections.
- possibly useful links: subspecies
- needs fixing:
- ”though the definite number of the them”
- ”Along with its numerous subspecies is the striking similarities in appearance that it shares with is fellow Toxostoma member…”
- ”The demeanor of the curve-billed has been described as "shy and rather wild", but have allowed humans to view it closely.” Aside from the grammar problems, I’m confused how it can be both shy and wild. Perhaps a explanation in your own words would be better than a quote?
- There’s three uses of “also” in the section paragraph of the lead, but none of them are really necessary (Also is a commonly overused word)
- link William John Swainson; unlink British
- ”Since then, six other subspecies have been recognized” Unless the first taxon was described as a subspecies, I think "other" should be removed from the sentence. "…and have been divided into eastern and western branches." what does this mean?
- ”Within genetic studies” ? "…research has indicated that the ocellated thrasher is the closest species related" -> "… is the most closely related species"
- link sister species
- the US states given in the Subspecies subsection should be linked (not all readers will be Americans); then unlink the later links in "Habitat and range"
- do the subspecies authorities have links?
- "This species is the representative of the western species" what does this mean? Isn’t it a subspecies?
- "It was rejected with an 8-3 vote of nos and yeses, respectively." is this important?
- link plumage, mottled, link retraces earlier
- "Juveniles are lacking in pale tips, retrices, its abdominal feathers are unkempt and fluffy," grammar
- "The variations of appearance occurs within the subspecies for the Curve-billed." awkward; recap Curve-billed
- "The eastern subspecies possess more discreet spotting on its chest" grammar
- "while the western group represented by T.c. palmeri have less" have->has?
- "Differences with each member of the two branches of the curve-billed is also significant." differences … are?
- "One study published in 2003 suggested that the variations of the curve-billed was due to temporal differences" what does this mean?
- "Bendire's typically have yellow eyes" fix punctuation (several other instances as well)
- link song call; why is Whit-Wheet capitalized but not chuck?
- per WP:CAPFRAG, sentence fragments should not have an ending period; also, italicize the binomial
- "In comparison with other desert thrashers, the curve-billed is not as peculiar with habitats." ? should that be ‘’particular’’?
- two consecutive sentences start with "The curve-billed thrasher is generally found on ground-level" (although the first has an unneeded hyphenation)
- "If it spots the nest of cactus wrens, they will" -> it …they … needs alignment
- "The songs can be uttered two to three times in succession, than ranges from 2 to 15 seconds." fix
- "One recorded case of courtship behavior involving curve-billed thrashers described two males attacking each over rigorously" each other? rigorously->vigorously?
- "The two males then puffed up twice their size" how is this possible?
- "The breeding season for the curve-billed begins in February, and its peak in March to May" fix
- "Nests are generally built from 0.6 to 6.1 m (2.0 to 20.0 ft)" too many significant figures for what is just an approximation
- "Both sexes build the nest, and time periods range from 3 days to 4 weeks." time period of what? Also, see MOS:NUMERAL (next sentence as well)
- "Both sexes also incubate" -> “Both sexes incubate the eggs" (link incubate)
- fledgelings->fledglings
- "The curve-billed has also been spotted eating dog food, and will feed them to their chicks." them->it
- @LeftAire:@Sasata: I'm just checking on the status of this review. It has been over a month since it was last touched. Cheers, TLSuda (talk) 16:30, 25 July 2014 (UTC)
- Another concern: There is some reliance on an unreliable source, Animal Diversity Web. The site has a disclaimer that it isn't that reliable, and I've seen gross errors on it before. —innotata 18:34, 25 July 2014 (UTC)
- Animal Diversity Web has been edited out. Continue on with the process of the review whenever ya'll get the chance. Thanks for reading! LeftAire (talk) 20:44, 3 August 2014 (UTC)
Is this still being reviewed? Last comments were a month ago and they all seem fixed. Wizardman 03:02, 20 August 2014 (UTC)
(talk page stalker) @Sasata: Are you still reviewing this? -- NickGibson3900 Talk Sign my Guestbook Contributions 08:10, 28 August 2014 (UTC)
Closing note: Since there aren't any new comments from the reviewer in a while, and all of his present concerns were addressed, I'll close the nomination as successful.--Retrohead (talk) 09:59, 18 September 2014 (UTC)