Talk:Circle dance/GA1
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Reviewer: Sainsf (talk · contribs) 18:27, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
Funny how I keep returning to your articles. But they are too interesting to miss :) Sainsf (talk · contribs) 18:27, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- Thank you, twice. This one has been languishing in the queue for months, so I'm very grateful for the attention. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:43, 20 April 2020 (UTC)
- No dablinks, one external link [1] shows a timeout error per this tool (I haven't checked where you use it in the article)
- Removed, it was for a book.
- copyvio unlikely ([2] shows certain websites that appear to have copied the wiki article and not the other way round) but some rephrasing can be done to reduce similarities to a page listed here [3]
- Done.
- Sourcing: Looks good, a few points:
and the Islamic Haḍra dances
needs inline citations
- Added.
- In 'Scandinavia' ref. 18 is repeated often, one mention should probably do
- Done.
- Most points in Notes are actually citations. Maybe move the actual notes out into a new section earlier?
- Renamed.
- I think you mean 'ISBN' in the first note
- Done.
- Date formats could be more consistent
- Done.
- A few refs (like 11 and 43) should include more details in the citation (accessdate, date etc)
- Added.
- Use |trans-title= and |language= parameters for foreign language titles
- Added.
- In refs. like 20 should the note not link to the original book source listed in 'Books'? Like the sfn citation style?
- Listed the major and general sources there for further reading.
- The images at places seem to be sandwiching the text. Maybe go for a gallery at the end to include more pics in a better manner?
- Fixed.
- Quite a few duplinks, check using this tool [4]
- Fixed.
Comments on prose
[edit]- In the lead, I feel the 1st and the 3rd paras would look great together. Maybe the 2nd and 4th could be merged too.
- Done.
- In Distribution, I think saying Balkan (to which it is linked to and which is later a section heading) sounds more precise than South Eastern European.
- Done.
- It might not be clear at once that Stecak is singular for Stecci.
- Added.
Thousands of medieval tombstones called "Stećci" were found in Bosnia and Hercegovina and neighboring areas
When? The way it is worded brings this question to the mind
- Edited.
which calls chain dances "devilish and damned."
Would be interesting if we can add why
- History does not relate. We may guess it was simply dislike of men and women getting together and enjoying themselves.
The circle dance of Germany was called "Reigen"
Until when? What about now?
- Fixed.
- Germany isn't linked while (I think all) others are
- Linking to articles on Dances of <country> but not major countries themselves.
In the 14th century Giovanni Boccaccio describes men and women circle dancing to their own singing or accompanied by musicians
Giovanni Boccaccio describes men and women circle dancing to their own singing or accompanied by musicians in the 14th century flows better
- Reworded.
painted in 1338-40
endash
- Fixed.
but also found in other countries (including Romania and Moldova)
'is'
- Added.
- At places the names of dances start with capital letters at others not
- Fixed.
- What does 'even 4 4' mean?
- It was "an even", i.e. steady.
An Dro, meaning "the turn"
Hyphen not there like section heading, italics not needed
- Fixed.
The Sacred Circle Dance was brought to
why italics?
- Removed.
consistent, vicious double bounce
Did not understand this
- Removed.
- A few very common terms like flowers, bride and groom are linked
- Removed.
- Captions that are sentence fragments should not end with a period
- Fixed.
That should be it. Thanks for the pleasant read. Sainsf (talk · contribs) 10:52, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- All done to date. Chiswick Chap (talk) 12:45, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- Changes look great, but did you miss the point on the lead? Cheers, Sainsf (talk · contribs) 16:13, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- Sainsf Yes! Done now. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:08, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- Wonderful :) Congrats on another GA! Sainsf (talk · contribs) 18:10, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- Sainsf Yes! Done now. Chiswick Chap (talk) 18:08, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- Changes look great, but did you miss the point on the lead? Cheers, Sainsf (talk · contribs) 16:13, 22 April 2020 (UTC)
- All done to date. Chiswick Chap (talk) 12:45, 22 April 2020 (UTC)