Talk:Christ Episcopal Church (Waltham, Massachusetts)/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Susanne2009NYC (talk) 05:22, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Lead.

This section could be expanded slightly with a bit of the history, materials used in the construction of the church, and a summary of the windows.

"Parish" should be linked for non-Christians unfamiliar with meaning of the word.

On first reading, I was not sure what "themes" in the second paragraph is intended to mean. Elaborate.

The gallery of 4 images disrupts the layout. Place the gallery at the foot of the page or move the images into the main body of the text at appropriate places.

Done - please let me know if you think the lead should still be expanded! I'm trying to keep it concise and just a very brief summary of the important points of the article. I agree about the opening gallery, but it is hard to tell the best placement for the images in the article. I'm very open to suggestions on placement if anyone has any specific ideas. Tim Pierce (talk)

The lead could use more expansion. I suggest the following:

Christ Episcopal Church, located at 750 Main Street, Waltham, Massachusetts, is a parish of the Episcopal Diocese of Massachusetts. The church was founded in 1848 and met in a local hall until 1849 when a Gothic wooden church was built on Central Street. By 1892, the structure had become inadequate for the congregation's needs, and, after several years of planning, a larger church designed by Peabody and Stearns was constructed of locally quarried stone on Main Street. First services were conducted in June 1898. The project was funded principally by lawyer and industrialist Robert Treat Paine, Jr. and philanthropist sisters Harriet Sarah and Mary Sophia Walker. Paine's wife died during construction of the church and is remembered as a red-clad figure kneeling before Christ in the east window. The west window by Charles Connick incorporates symbols of Waltham's industrial heritage, and the south window, a product of the Tiffany studios, depicts the Nativity. Eight rectors have served the church since its founding, and, in 1989, the structure was named to the National Register of Historic Places."

The placement of images is quite acceptable. However, they should not be resized. This creates distortion on some computers. Only the image at the top of page is allowed to be resized and only to 300px. Susanne2009NYC (talk) 20:37, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

History.

There are possibilities for links. Masonic Temple, for example, and Gothic, Brunswick, Maine, Roman Catholic, French Canadian, and others.

I've added some links to these and some other terms that I missed the first time around (e.g. escapement). I'm not generally a big fan of wikilinking well known terms and places, but I'm certainly willing to add them if it seems important. Tim Pierce (talk)

Everyday words (house, cat, dog, car) should not be linked but any word that would be unfamiliar to a reader of average intelligence and education should be linked. Church terminology such as "rector", "parish hall", "sanctuary", and "steeple" should be linked. Susanne2009NYC (talk) 20:28, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Architecture and Design.

The 'D' in "Design" is not capitalized.

Again, create links - fieldstone, for example, could be linked as well as sanctuary, steeple, and others.

The material on the windows could be a separate section or a subsection. Perhaps the first sentence could read: "The East Window was built by the English firm of XYZ, and was the gift of [...]". The bulleting in this area is unnecesary. East Window, West Window, and Nativity Window are not capitalized.

I'm not sure "sanctuary" is correct here: "at the far end of the sanctuary". Nave, I think, is the correct word. The sanctuary is the area behind the altar rail.

Done. FWIW, I didn't collect the information on the windows, and suspect that "East Window", "West Window" etc. were capitalized in the original sources. But if the capitalization only serves to distract, it's probably appropriate to take it out. I'm reluctant to revise "sanctuary" without confirming whether the source uses that word. I can try to find a copy of the source for the windows to check this. Tim Pierce (talk)

Rectors.

The word rector is not capitalized. I've linked the term.

There's a gap of several years between the present rector and her predecessor. This should explained.

I'll try to find an answer for this question. Tim Pierce (talk)

I hope we have an answer. Curious readers will want to know what was happening! Susanne2009NYC (talk) 20:28, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

External links.

If an external link is used in as a reference citation, it shouldn't be listed in the external links section. I've deleted "Christ Church Waltham – Official website for Christ Church" from the external links section.

Good catch, thanks. Tim Pierce (talk)

Prose.

The prose could be tightened here and there. This passage, for example, could be reworded:

"About the time that Fales retired, Christ Church had outgrown its building on Central Street, and the parish bought land at 750 Main Street in 1892 for the purposes of building a new, larger church."

More concise:

"About the time Fales retired, the church had outgrown the Central Street structure. In 1892, land was purchased at 750 Main Street for the construction of a larger building."

Fair enough. I'll give it another read-through for general style issues. Tim Pierce (talk) 16:47, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Please do. There are several places where the prose can be bettered. Susanne2009NYC (talk) 20:28, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I'll return for the final review. Susanne2009NYC (talk) 07:14, 19 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

Please enter (if available):

Height of the steeple, length of the nave
Names of the interim priests-in-charge
Information on the garden statue: sculptor's name, date of installation, donor(s), material, etc.
Organ, builder, date of installation
Bells, cast by, date of installation
I've placed the image of the western facade in the infobox because it's a more traditional representation of a church. Is the parish house visible to the left in the other image? If so, it could be noted in the caption.
I've expanded the lead.
Some material is uncited and appears OR: "Visitors enter the church through a narthex below ..." This passage is unsourced, as is the passage about the church interior.
There are digressions that divert the focus from the subject. The Walker sisters living at Gore Place is one. This and a few others should be reworked. The focus should remain on the church.

Please let me know when you have finished revisions so the review can be closed. Susanne2009NYC (talk) 18:41, 21 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]

I've done a copy edit (taking care of the suggestions above as much as possible) and have passed the article to GA. Some images I've removed because they are available via the wikicommons template at the bottom of the page. I have removed some material that was uncited and appeared OR. Return the material if you find a reliable source. Please try to enter the material below. The lack of this material will not jeopardize the article's GA status but it would be appropriate to have it entered. Be sure it is sited to a reliable source!

Height of the steeple, length of the nave
Names of the interim priests-in-charge
Information on the garden statue: sculptor's name, date of installation, donor(s), material, etc.
Organ, builder, date of installation
Bells, cast by, date of installation

Final Review for Christ Episcopal Church (Waltham, Massachusetts)

Well-written: (a) the prose is clear and the spelling and grammar are correct; PASS (b) it complies with the manual of style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation. PASS

Factually accurate and verifiable: (a) it provides references to all sources of information in the section(s) dedicated to the attribution of these sources according to the guide to layout; PASS (b) it provides in-line citations from reliable sources for direct quotations, statistics, published opinion, counter-intuitive or controversial statements that are challenged or likely to be challenged, and contentious material relating to living persons—science-based articles should follow the scientific citation guidelines; PASS (c) it contains no original research. PASS

Broad in its coverage: (a) it addresses the main aspects of the topic; PASS (b) it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style). PASS

Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without bias. PASS

Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute. PASS

Illustrated, if possible, by images: (a) images are tagged with their copyright status, and valid fair use rationales are provided for non-free content; PASS (b) images are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions. PASS

Congratulations! I encourage the nominator to review an article at GAN!Susanne2009NYC (talk) 22:24, 21 July 2010 (UTC)[reply]