Talk:Charter School (Massachusetts)

Assessment

This article has a significant number of references and lots of content, but almost all of the references are to primary sources. Therefore, I have assessed this as "Start" class until someone can review the article carefully to determine where secondary sourcing is necessary. -- Ssilvers (talk) 18:56, 27 July 2011 (UTC)

Betsy's Comments

You all should check out the WikiProject Education page. There may be folks interested in collaborating on your article there, and you can find ways to connect your article to other education articles. Elizabetsyatbu (talk) 18:16, 7 April 2011 (UTC)

Jenn's comments

Looks like a lot of research went into this article! One general comment is that it seems that you use a lot of terms that have not been previously defined. Maybe a box with definitions would be useful to readers?

In the section: Inception of Charter Schools in Massachusetts

• What sets charter schools apart from typical public schools? Could you describe the differences before the second paragraph begins with “The increased freedom…”
• How are “good results” defined?
• What are the details of the governor’s proposal? What is the timeline for implementation?

I think maybe the article will flow better if the Accountability section is moved up before the Funding section. This way readers will have more info on what Charter Schools are before getting into the detail on funding. — Preceding unsigned comment added by Jgrandfield (talk • contribs) 00:13, 4 April 2011 (UTC)

More Comments

Funding for charter schools is certainly complicated! One suggestion for your article might be to include a map of Massachusetts which highlights some of the towns where there are charter schools. You may also want to considering making the title of your article more narrow in scope--this title makes me think I am going to learn everything about charter schools in MA--maybe specify that you are talking about policy and/or funding. Interesting overall! Bethkn (talk) 17:15, 4 April 2011 (UTC)

Bridget's comments

Interesting article! I learned a lot about funding charter schools in MA. I also agree with Jenn’s comment about moving the Accountability section before the Funding section. This will give the reader a definition of a “charter school” before describing how they are funded.

I also had the following suggestions:

• I would be curious to know what percentage of the students in MA attend charter schools? This percentage could replace the 29,000 mentioned in the opening paragraph. According to the article, “a maximum of 4% of the states student population may be enrolled in charter school.” I would be curious to know if the state of MA has hit the maximum amount.
• I would also suggest reducing the font size in the exhibits so that the boxes flow better with the rest of the text. I would also suggest putting dollar signs next to the amounts in the exhibits, where applicable. Line 9 should also be carried out to 2 decimals to demonstrate how the 800 (line 10) was achieved.

Great article overall! — Preceding unsigned comment added by Mango42 (talk • contribs) 20:53, 4 April 2011 (UTC)

Deepa's Comments

I agree with the comments above, but my main suggestion would be to change the "Inception" section to an "An Overview of Charter Schools in MA" so you could then specify/further clarify the points you make (e.g. inception/history, types, metrics, "how to get a charter"). Also, I really liked the clarity of the tuition section!

Thoughts on scope and style

You guys have done a fantastic job so far. If I could offer any feedback, it would be just what it says in the box at the top: more secondary sources. The article currently relies heavily on Massachusetts Department of Education sources, and that is reflected in the scope of the article's content. You've got a lot of excellent information about the technical aspects of policy, but keep in mind that this should be a full treatment of the topic. If you were to seek out and use more news and scholarly sources, I think you would find that the kind of information they provide would fill the holes in coverage. For example, as a reader, I would still like to know more about the history, the politics (are there opponents/reform advocates?), and something about the schools themselves. I would try checking out LexisNexis and Google News for media coverage, and Google Scholar and your school's subscription databases for academic sources.

Finally, you might want to spend a little time working on things like formatting and structure. Wikipedia:Writing better articles is a great resource. In particular, I would recommend looking at the section on writing leads, as that is one area where this article could be improved. The lead section should define the topic clearly; the article's current opening sentence doesn't actually mention Massachusetts and, while it might be a reasonable topic sentence for a paper, it's not exactly Wikipedia style. There are also some slight issues with tone. Sentences like "Charter school closures are evidence of accountability in action" are too close to promoting a certain viewpoint. It might be preferable to reword that to say that a particular entity, whether the Board of Education or the governor, believes they are evidence of accountability. Wikipedia generally uses "sentence-style" capitalization in titles and section headings, meaning words should be lower-case unless they are the first word or would be capitalized normally (as in a proper noun). "Tuition and State Funding" should be "Tuition and state funding" and so on. I would also recommend greater linking (see "Build the web" section). Most concrete subjects and names should be linked if they would increase reader comprehension, from things like "Massachusetts," "Worcester, Massachusetts," and "501(c)(3)" to concepts like "special education" and "school districts." This will also make blocks of text easier on the eyes. Please let me know what issues you are having, and if you have any questions. Dominic·t 18:29, 14 April 2011 (UTC) Great contemporary topic – presentation requires revisions for objectivity. — Preceding unsigned comment added by 23.30.163.26 (talk) 20:56, 1 October 2013 (UTC)

Wikipedia Ambassador Program course assignment

This article is the subject of an educational assignment supported by the Wikipedia Ambassador Program during the 2011 Spring term.

The above message was substituted from {{WAP assignment}} by PrimeBOT (talk) on 16:37, 2 January 2023 (UTC)