Talk:Calliphora vomitoria/GA1
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Reviewer: Jens Lallensack (talk · contribs) 16:32, 11 January 2020 (UTC)
@Y.shiuan: Happy to review. Before I start, may I ask you to resolve the sourcing issues ("citation needed" tags)? It is a requirement that all information of a Good Article is properly sourced. Thank you, --Jens Lallensack (talk) 16:32, 11 January 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Thank you for being willing to review this article! Question, where can I find the citation needed tags? I am not seeing it Y.shiuan (talk) 03:23, 15 January 2020 (UTC)
- My bad, I must have confused this one with a different article. Never mind. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 22:46, 15 January 2020 (UTC)
Lead
- or bottlebee is a common blow fly, a species in the family Calliphoridae – since "common" is again mentioned in the next sentence, I suggest the simpler wording "or bottlebee is a species of blow fly (Calliphoridae)". This also makes clear that blow flies and Calliphoridae are the same.
- It is relatively common throughout many widespread regions throughout the world. – Perhaps "It is relatively common in many regions of the world"? Otherwise I don't fully understand it.
- When reading the details in the main text, "relatively common" seems to be an understatement (why not just "common"?), while "many regions of the world" seems a bit much, as it is not a cosmopolitan species. Consider mentioning the occurrences as done in the main text.
- the blue bottle fly females deposit their eggs on rotting corpses – just "femals deposit their eggs …" is enough, no need to state "the blue bottle fly" here, just makes it difficult to read.
- oviposition – I would link this term, as not everybody will be familiar with it.
Main text
- thorax, abdomen, tarsi, hibernate, salivary gland are terms to link if possible, to make the article as accessible as possible.
- I miss an important practical information from the description section: How can the species be differentiated from related species? What are the diagnostic features? Is identification possible based on simple photographs, or is microscopy needed?
- The pupal stage is the longest stage before they emerge. – before the adult stage? Does that mean that the adult stage is even longer? Could be made clearer.
- the adults emerge to mate – you mean they emerge from the pupa?
- At the beginning of metamorphosis – I assume during the pupal stage?
- Then, on day 9, cell death occurs. – cell death of what? Of the whole fly?
- The paragraph on the apoptosis is not easy to follow. Maybe focus on describing the precise life cycle of the fly first, and only then explain what this means for the assumption of adoptosis = programmed cell death.
- How long does the adult life?
- it has been shown that when processed substrates, such as beef and turkey, – but beef and turkey is not necessarily processed? With processed you mean cooked?
- rather than unprocessed substrates such as liver – liver can also be processed food? What is the difference to beef and turkey?
- C. vomitoria is best characterized as a specialist. – A specialist on processed foods? On what it is specialised naturally?
- Growth rates between surface and buried larvae grew at a similar pace – maybe use "increased" here?
- the fly larvae leaves the carrion can burrow into the soil in order to pupate. – is a "that" missing? "The fly larvae that leaves"?
- C. vomitoria shares carcasses with other species such as – with other calliphorid species?
- Reference 21 is not working.
- They mainly pollinate skunk cabbage (Symplocarpus foetidus), American pawpaw (Asimina triloba), dead horse arum (Helicodiceros muscivorus), goldenrod and some species of the carrot family – Not sure about this statement; the mentioned species do not occur over the whole range of the species. Maybe write "plants pollinated by the fly include …" instead of "mainly"?
- more later. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 22:46, 15 January 2020 (UTC) Forgot to ping @Y.shiuan: --Jens Lallensack (talk) 07:44, 16 January 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Thank you for the many thoughtful suggestions, I'll keep working on the article Y.shiuan (talk) 01:21, 20 January 2020 (UTC)
@Y.shiuan: As month has passed, I just want to check where we are standing? There is no deadline, though in case you need much more time, it may be better when I close this nomination now, and you nominate again when you are done. In the latter case, I can offer to take on the review again, so that we can continue where we were. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 20:32, 21 February 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Hi! Sorry, I had a very packed beginning of the semester that recently let up. I've been working on the page in small bits in the last week or two, and I am still working on it now that I can dedicate more time to it. I would still like to continue with this current nomination if that's fine with you? Thank you so much for reviewing it and for being so patient! Y.shiuan (talk) 00:49, 24 February 2020 (UTC)
- Cool, glad to hear that! Take your time. --Jens Lallensack (talk) 06:29, 24 February 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Hello! Sorry for the delay, but I think I've covered everything you suggested so far. I did have difficulty finding info on how long the adult lives (papers seem to focus on life cycle up to adult stage). Y.shiuan (talk) 17:24, 4 March 2020 (UTC)
@Y.shiuan: Some more now, more later:
- Calliphora vomitoria occurs in most of Europe, Alaska, Greenland, the south of Mexico, Virginia, Hawaii, and southern Africa – Why is the distribution so fragmented? They only occur in Virginia but not elsewhere in mainland US? Cannot believe.
- Blow flies like C. vomitoria lay their eggs at carrion sites, which are scarce in most places so they end up with lots of eggs on corpses, laid by different species. – not an ideal sentence, since it is not clear on what "they" is referring to. The corpses? The bow flies? Maybe more precise: "which are scarse in most places and so commonly contain eggs from multiple individuals of separate species" or similar?
- likely because of contact and chemical stimulation – after "because of" I would expect to hear the "advantage" of having increased oviposition. Maybe "triggered by" is more precise here?
- increase oviposition – do you mean they increase the speed of oviposition? "Increase oviposition rate" or something maybe?
- The large number of larvae, though, actually ends up being beneficial in the group. – Also not ideal. We don't need both "though" and "actually". "In the group" is redundant with "the large number of larvae", or do you mean "for the group" (which also does not make sense)? "For the individual"? But then I would also add an "generally".
- One complication with these benefits – Not with the benefits, but with the high number of individuals.
- Its application to forensic science, stems from the idea that the time of oviposition can then be determined – I don't understand. How do you determine the time, you were only talking about day and night? Also, we don't need the comma I think.
- Section "Brain" – I think this is better named "Hormones"?
- at base of their 2 claws – at "the" base of their "two" claws?
- make sure there is no space in front of the citations. Example: "and it has been concluded that lateral pulls required much greater forces. [28][29]"
- The force of adhesion between vertical and lateral pulls has been measured, and it has been concluded that lateral pulls required much greater forces. – Can't follow this; with "much greater forces" you mean greater forces of adhesion or stronger pulls? --Jens Lallensack (talk) 19:48, 4 March 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Done! Ready for the next set Y.shiuan (talk) 17:12, 9 March 2020 (UTC)
- to conclude that lateral pulls required much stronger pulls – this still does not make sense. Pulls require pulls? Require to do what? To displace the insect? If so, maybe just mention that.
- "forensics" should be linked at first mention
- These flies are among the most important insect evidence in forensic science.[14] Calliphora species in particular – I don't understand the "in particular". That suggest that a broader category was mentioned previously. But "these flies" can only be refer to the topic of the article, which is a single species.
- the time since eggs were laid – "when" the eggs where laid?
- In addition, C. vomitoria has higher threshold temperature than many species; likewise, it is present in many regions. – Is this about climate or corpse temperature? I am confused.
- 35 degrees Fahrenheit – please provide °C as well.
- Carcasses are divided into several different stages – This reads as if carcasses are physically divided. What about "Degradation of carcasses can be divided into …"
- into several different stages – why not "into six separate stages"? Be as precise as possible.
- In buried corpses, the timing and how body was stored – timing of what? And: how "the" body was stored?
- how the body was stored can be collected – I don't understand, what is collected? Also, can this be more precise?
- through the identification of C. vomitoria in these substrates – why do we need "in these substrates"?
- The study of these flies, however, are limited to areas where entomologists are readily available, – "is" limited
- as each region may contain the same species but with different life histories – maybe "as life histories can differ in separate regions"? Would be good to have some information on how the life histories differ. Are these subtle or big differences?
- In order for C. vomitoria to provide useful data to investigators, these restrictions should be considered, so the proper time of colonization (TOC) and post mortem interval (PMI) can be established. – This sentence has three parts. The first part seems redundant with the third part and can be removed without loosing information I think.
- time of colonization (TOC) and post mortem interval (PMI) – as this seems to be the goal of the forensics (?), it could be mentioned much earlier in the section. Also: What is the post mortem interval, can this be explained or linked?
- Forensic scientists sometimes identify it in the course of their work – "in the course of their work" says nothing and can be removed.
- particularly in the case of an autopsy of a neglected child. – a single case?
@Y.shiuan: – only one section today, but I think this one really needs work as I found it difficult to read. Sorry for all the stop-and-go, but my time per day is currently quite limited. One more round and we should be done! --Jens Lallensack (talk) 20:05, 9 March 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Hi, sorry for the wait- I believe I'm done with that part! I ended up deleting the bit about the pulls because I couldn't really make sense of it either. Hope all is well for you with everything that's been going on! Y.shiuan (talk) 23:35, 20 March 2020 (UTC)
- All good, thanks – hope on your side as well! --Jens Lallensack (talk) 11:51, 23 March 2020 (UTC)
- Some methods that can best differentiate between the species – "some" seems somehow in conflict with "best". If these are only some methods, these cannot be the best. I suggest to remove "Some".
- COI gene used in conjunction with the SfcI restriction enzyme – these terms need to be linked, and/or the abbreviation spelled out and explained.
- Post mortem interval (PMI) – suggest to remove the abbreviation (PMI) from the section heading and place it in the article text.
- C. vomitoria is important for PMI because – "for PMI estimations"
- C. vomitoria is important for PMI because they – "C. vomitoria" is singular, "they" is plural. Better "because it is among the first species to lay eggs" or similar.
- Another way to calculate PMI is to calculate accumulated degree hours/days (ADH/D) – I do not understand this.
- Calliphora vomitoria is considered one of the most important flies in medico-legal cases. – You already stated that it is important for forensics; what is the difference to "legal cases"?
- Calliphora vomitoria is frequently used as pollinators – this implies that it is cultivated for this purpose. Really?
- The flies feed on the nectar of these crops and then proceed to spread their seeds when they fly. These pollination events – seed dispersal and pollination are two different things!
@Y.shiuan: – that's it! --Jens Lallensack (talk) 11:51, 23 March 2020 (UTC)
@Jens Lallensack: Done! Y.shiuan (talk) 20:15, 29 March 2020 (UTC) @Y.shiuan: – Looks good, thanks! Promoting now, congrats! --Jens Lallensack (talk) 20:17, 29 March 2020 (UTC) @Jens Lallensack: Thank you so much! Y.shiuan (talk) 22:23, 29 March 2020 (UTC)