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Talk:Call My Name (Third Day song)/GA1

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Reviewer: User:Jivesh boodhun (talk · contribs) 09:55, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Lead
  • Written by Mac Powell and composed by Third Day, "Call My Name" was released as the lead single from the band's 2008 album Revelation, and has been considered a "pop rock" and "AC-friendly" song with a "basic" drum track and a "solid" melody. Lyrically, it has been alternately described as being set from the perspective of God or being a cry out to God.
This phrase is quite sloppy. I suggest re-writing to:
Written by Mac Powell and produced by Third Day, it was released as the lead single from the band's 2008 album Revelation through Essential Records. "Call My Name" has been considered a pop rock and "AC-friendly" song with a basic drum track and a "solid" melody. Lyrically, it has been alternately described as being set from the perspective of God or being a cry out to God.
Rewritten Toa Nidhiki05 20:41, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Link lead single
    Done Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Link Essential Records to where appropriate
    Done Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Note that composed = write + produced; that's partly why your sentence was incorrect.
    Alright. Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Common terms or comparisons/descriptions that are not extravagant should not be quoted.
    Okay. Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • "Call My Name" was a hit on Christian radio, peaking atop the Billboard Hot Christian Songs and Hot Christian AC charts and the Radio & Records Christian AC Monitored, Christian AC Indicator, and Christian CHR charts. - For consistency, remove the comma after Christian AC Indicator.
  • Billboard magazine ranked "Call My Name" second on the 2008 year-end Hot Christian Songs chart and third on the 2008 year-end Hot Christian AC chart, and at twenty-seventh on the decade-end Hot Christian Songs chart and at thirty-sixth on the decade-end Hot Christian AC chart. - Remove the comma after Hot Christian AC chart and avoid repeatedly writing the name of the song at such proximity. It becomes repetitive,. Find alternatives.
    Fixed Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
General comment: The lead is dry at best. It focuses too much on charts. There is nothing about critical reception and how the song was promoted (live performances). Jivesh1205 (Talk) 10:08, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
I've added info on critical reception, live performance, and the Keith Urban cover. Toa Nidhiki05 20:05, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Background
  • "Call My Name" was one of the first songs that Third Day worked on in their initial writing session for Revelation in Charlottesville, Virginia. - Do you see how this looks repetitive? You are actually saying the same thing in different words.
I suggest rewriting to: "Call My Name" was one of the first songs that Third Day worked on in their writing session for Revelation in Charlottesville, Virginia.
  • Good idea, fixed. Toa Nidhiki05 20:10, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • while audio engineering was handled by Ashburn Miller with additional engineering handled by Hatsukazu Inagaki. - Another case of repetitiveness.
    Fixed Toa Nidhiki05 20:10, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • Pre-production was handled at Haunted Hollow Studio in Charlottesville, Virginia by Rob Evans and Steve Miller, at Tree Sound Studios in Norcross, Georgia by Don McCollister, and at Sonica Recording in Atlanta, Georgia by Jon Briglevich.[2] - Why is this sentence the last in this section?
    Not sure, but I moved it to be the second sentence on the technical subject. Toa Nidhiki05 20:10, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
General comment: It sure is very technical but I enjoyed reading it. Be careful to source all your sentences. Jivesh1205 (Talk) 10:13, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Composition
  • "Call My Name" is a Christian rock song with a length of four minutes and two seconds. --> "Call My Name" is a Christian rock song that lasts for four minutes and two seconds.
    Done Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • It is set in common time in the key of E major and has a "driving rock" tempo of 78 beats per minute, with Mac Powell's vocal range spanning from B3-F♯5. - Break into two sentences.
The correct sentence should be: It was composed using common time in the key of E major, with "driving rock" tempo of 78 beats per minute. Mac Powell's vocal range spans from the low note of B3 to the high note of F♯5.
And please links those two musical notes.
  • Done on all three. Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • David Carr, the drummer for Third Day, described them as "crying out to God and calling out his name",[1] while Mac Powell described the lyrics as "kind of a prayer... --> * David Carr, the drummer for Third Day, described the lyrics as "crying out to God and calling out his name",[1] while Mac Powell described them as "kind of a prayer.....
    Done Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • It has been also been considered as being "well crafted"[9] and as having "smart hooks"[7] and a "strong melody"[7], while Mac Powell's vocals have been considered "impressive". --> Purely critical reception.
    Moved Toa Nidhiki05
  • And I see too many considered ... considered ...
    Shouldn't be too big of an issue now. Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • A music sample if possible?
    I don't have the software to upload it and haven't a clue how to do it, so that is the only reason why it isn't there. Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
General comment: This section looks dry but I understand it may be due to the lack of reviews, etc. I want to list some examples of decent composition sections you can read. Let me know if you want them. Jivesh1205 (Talk) 10:23, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
That would be good, yeah. The reasoning is lack of reviews - long reviews are (understandably) quite hard to find for Christian songs. Toa Nidhiki05 20:24, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Reception
Critical
Chart performance
General comment: Good. Jivesh1205 (Talk) 10:48, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
Other uses
  • Unlink Australian
    Done
Live performances
  • I see over-lining of the album name.
    Unlinked Toa Nidhiki05 20:28, 5 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
  • performed the song on April 3, 2008 at the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie, New York, joined on stage by Scotty Wilbanks. - performed the song on April 3, 2008 at the Mid-Hudson Civic Center in Poughkeepsie, New York, where they were joined on stage by Scotty Wilbanks.
You gave the impression that Wilbanks joined Poughkeepsie, New York. :)
Personnel
Charts
Wow. I am impressed. Nice job with the changes applied. Jivesh1205 (Talk)
Thanks - I can get this type of stuff done pretty quickly. :) Toa Nidhiki05 20:18, 13 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]
References

Note that only magazines and published newspapers are are written in italics.

More to come. Jivesh1205 (Talk) 11:25, 13 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Jivesh1205 (Talk) 11:45, 16 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]


GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Passing. Jivesh1205 (Talk) 08:17, 17 March 2012 (UTC)[reply]

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