Talk:Burger King products/GA1

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

GA Review

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Reviewer: 12george1 (talk) 00:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

GA review (see here for criteria)

It is reasonably well written.
a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
It is factually accurate and verifiable.
a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
It is broad in its coverage.
a (major aspects): b (focused):
It follows the neutral point of view policy.
Fair representation without bias:
It is stable.
No edit wars, etc.:
It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Pre-review comments

I will be reviewing this article for GA, I have many things that need to be done, but they are some minor changes, so I will not immediately fail this nomination. I will add to this page as I read the article. I will not display that section if I believe that it passes the criteria.

General

~~Look for occurrences of a word being wikilinked more than once in the article, and delink all but the first mention of that word such as the following:~~
Fixed In the history: Whopper, Donald N. Smith, Cheddar cheese, Pepper jack cheese, and BK Baguette line. Also there are several occurrences of the linking to the terms "globalization" and "fillets"; Icee is linked twice, delink the second occurrence in the second paragraph of Soft Drinks section. Good --12george1 (talk) 17:13, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Lead

Fixed On the second paragraph, the first sentence is: "1978 saw the introduction of breakfast items and an expanded menu featuring the introduction of the company's "Specialty Sandwich" product line". I personally think sentences seem a bit awkward with they start with a date or year. Is there anyway you can re-word that sentence so it doesn't start with 1978, such as: "By 1978, saw the introduction breakfast items were introduced, along with an expanded menu featuring the introduction of the company's "Specialty Sandwich" product line"?--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed ~~Wikilink some of the words in the lead that should probably be linked to, like link "United States" in the first paragraph and "Pillsbury" in the third.--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)~~[reply]

History

Sandwiches and entrées

Fixed Why is milkshake linked in this section (5th paragraph), rather than the lead? It should be the first time that the word is used.--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]
Fixed One more thing here: with the mention of US currency with using "(USD)" on the end, it is not shown until the last time in that section (5th paragraph), when it should be after the first or all of the US currency values.--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Ancillaries

Fixed Why wait until now to link "french fries"? It is literally used in the first sentence of the entire article--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Breakfast

Fixed Abbreviate 12-ounces in the third paragraph, and convert to grams--12george1 (talk) 00:43, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Demographic targeting

Value

Fixed Wikilink the Euro at the "€" symbol--12george1 (talk) 00:59, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Children

Fixed Abbreviate 16-ounces in the third paragraph, and convert to grams--12george1 (talk) 00:59, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Suppliers and purchasing

Purchasing guidelines for meat

Fixed Is there anyway you can convert the listed bullet point under the 2001 and 2008 Guidelines into prose?--12george1 (talk) 00:59, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Food

Fixed Under sides and desserts there is nothing more about the supplier Otis Spunkmeyer--12george1 (talk) 02:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

References

The following ref are dead links:
- Fixed #51
- Fixed #97
- Fixed #98
- Fixed #112
- Fixed #114
- Fixed #123
- Fixed #136
- Fixed #138
- Fixed #148
- Fixed #174
- Fixed #177
- Fixed #181

--12george1 (talk) 02:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

The following have bare references:
- Fixed #34
- Fixed #67
- Fixed #82
- Fixed #104

Fixed Several date inconsistencies, like at first this is what I see: day-month-year. But then going done the list, I see year-month-day, even worse I find the date numerically year-month-date. Please fix all of the inconsistencies.--12george1 (talk) 02:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Notes

Fixed #4 is a dead link--12george1 (talk) 02:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Conclusion

Although I see several errors, I am not going to fail just yet, because it is mostly minor stuff, except for the references. Also I would like to see this as a good article because my mom was a former Burger King manager.--12george1 (talk) 02:09, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for picking up on those listed issues and for doing the review. While I work on converting to text the bulleted lists, is there anything else that you see that needs to be addressed? --Jeremy (blah blah • I did it!) 19:55, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Yes, I have one small task left: some of the references are exposing the URL, like #34, 67, 82, 104. Fix this problem and the dead link for ref #97 and I will pass. Also, sorry for some of the more "nit-picky" tasks, but I am in the WikiCup and I needed to make a legit review for points.--12george1 (talk) 21:48, 3 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

You're not being nit picky, look at my review for Maple syrup here, Malvern water here or Cuisine of Madagascar here. If anything you may be being a little hasty, which may result in a GA review - something I do not want to deal with. Would you mind running through a GA checklist? I put one at the top. --Jeremy (blah blah • I did it!) 04:47, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Done I finished making the edits you requested, if you want to go through and see if there is anything else that needs to be done or that was missed by me that would be great. Otherwise again, thanks for the review. --Jeremy (blah blah • I did it!) 18:26, 4 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

Nope, it is all finished, I will pass on the GA nomination.--12george1 (talk) 03:52, 5 January 2011 (UTC)[reply]

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.