Talk:Briarcliff Manor, New York/GA1

GA Review

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Reviewer: Peripitus (talk · contribs) 21:42, 18 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I'll be going through this in the next few days. At first read though it appears sufficiently broad, perhaps too detailed in a few places, and well referenced. I'll fix simple textual issues as I progress - Peripitus (Talk) 21:42, 18 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

There are some textual issues that I cannot resolve.

Names

~~Railway station note - has the sign "Briercliff West" ever been replaced ?~~

No, the building had a Scarborough sign from then until the building became a post office.--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Progressive era to present day

~~"Putnam Division " requires readers to follow the link to find out this is related to the railway. Should be text in the article explaining this.~~-done--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

~~Consider changing "senior housing" to retirement home. I had to follow the link to determine it was NOT boarding housing for senior school students.~~-done--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Geography

Claims the highest level is 500ft amsl and the lowest 100ft amsl. The infobox claims 0-1200 ft. The 0 and 1200ft bits should be in the geography section and I can't find a reference for them. Is the 100-500 ft bit just for the central residential part ? I notice that some text on this is commented out in the article where it is stated that the min elevation at the river is 8-42 feet rather than 0.

Well, the geography section says it ranges from <100ft to ~500ft. The infobox says 0 ft to 533 ft as the extremes of the village's elevation, while the geography section gives rougher boundaries. The "1200 ft" part is in the description of where the highest point is. All of this should now be fixed on the main article.--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Ah ! Now I understand. - Peripitus (Talk) 11:37, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Climate

The sentence "Summer high temperatures average in the lower 80s Fahrenheit (upper 20s Celsius), with lows averaging in the lower 60s F (upper 10s C)" - this seems to be just duplicating what is in the table below. I'm not sure it's necessary.

I know, but a climate section should ideally have more than just a table, and it has benefit to explain it out, especially with such an information-filled table. As well, I used FA city articles as references; they all seem to do this.--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Fair enough - Peripitus (Talk) 11:15, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Neighborhoods

Section I think should be called "Areas" as it covers all sorts of bits of the Manor. What exactly is a neighborhood in the article's context ?

"Areas" isn't a term used with small municipalities around here, so the best term perhaps is "neighborhoods". Also, describing a neighborhood can often be tricky. They don't call Scarborough a hamlet, saying it's more of a "state of mind" - anyone can say they live there, and nobody in the village can tell you where it starts and another area ends.--ɱ (talk) 03:10, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Ok. Regardless the section heading is understandable. - Peripitus (Talk) 11:15, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Demographics

"has not changed significantly." from what initial state and when …. ? Is this statement just covering the post 1990 period ? I'm not sure that 1990 is historical but would expect this term for somewhere in the more distant past

It's the best sourced information that I can find, and I wanted to separate it from all of the current demographics below that, and it'll leave room for further historical demographics information to be added.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Arts and Culture

"Before the parade begins, the Municipal Building's bell is rung to commemorate firefighters who have died in the previous year." - firefighters who died in the Manor, or in a wider geographical area ? I assume the latter otherwise it's a rather dangerous workplace.

I no longer have the book to refer to the original source, but I assume it refers to firefighters across the county or state. I'l try to fill in that information ASAP.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I just got back from the library where it's held - the book doesn't have any more information. It probably means that the bell is rung for deaths in the area; only 82 firefighters died in New York State in the last decade (an average of 8 per year). So, in the absence of more information, the sentence should probably stay as it is.--ɱ (talk) 00:15, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Ok. - Peripitus (Talk) 11:15, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Historical Society

"Briarcliff Manor maintains strong ties to its history and traditions." - I think this sentence is evident in the later material and is not needed as an introductory line.

I couldn't think of a better introductory sentence, and the sentence is true although vague. Can you suggest anything?--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I'm not strongly tempted either way. Is not a significant issue as it stands - Peripitus (Talk) 11:37, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Rather than BM-SHS, why not the more readable "historical society"

I wanted to intersperse "BMSHS" and "historical society", plus I refer to the society later in the 'notable people' section and don't want to be vague as to which historical society I am referring.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Does look better now - Peripitus (Talk) 11:37, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Houses of Worship

How about "religion" instead as this covers the people as well as the buildings.

Perhaps, although I can see others suggesting the current title over that one because the section is more specifically mentioning the churches and synagogues in the village, and every single one too.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Sports

Fair enough - Peripitus (Talk) 11:37, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

~~What in particular do The Settlers play ? Are they an athletic club of Pace University ?~~-done--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

~~"The school is also affiliated" does this refer to Briarcliff High School or Pace University, if the latter I think the wording needs changing.~~-done--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

"Briarcliff Manor has a history of auto racing" where there just the three races (1908, 1934 and 1935). If so I'd leave this sentence out as three races does not really make for a racing history.

I don't know how better to sum it up, say "Briarcliff Manor has held three international races and a centennial parade." and then go on to detail?--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I've never been convinced that parts of articles need either introductions or summing up. That said the sentence is supported by the subsequent text - Peripitus (Talk) 11:37, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Government

"The current head" - needs changing to "as of (date)" format.-done--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Media

"Official newspapers for the village" What is the difference between a newspaper and an official one ? Do they have to be licensed somehow ?

The municipality government resolves that it is the official newspaper. As far as I know there's no real difference. Here's an example resolution: here--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Infrastructure

"The commissioner in 1914 was Arthur Brown; asked by village officials if he needed an automobile, Brown replied that he preferred a horse but would use an automobile if the village purchased it (it did not).". I'm not sure how this sentence is relevant to the article on the manor. The area's history would be replete with odd anecdotes such as this, and this one feels out of place.

It helps readers understand better than simple facts can - Brown didn't embrace automobiles, likely because of his trust in the reliability of horses and that he'd have to learn to use an automobile. It also puts a slightly negative light on the village for being conservative in spending money. What makes this interesting and perhaps anecdotal is that it's a very specific historical account as opposed to general information usually relayed in histories of settlements.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Possibly also because in 1914 automobiles were still uncommon and, for many, expensive. The sentence is fine I just found it little out of place - Peripitus (Talk) 11:41, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

~~"The department also controls the village's own municipal water supply system." hasn't the prior paragraph already stated this in that they supply water from the aqueduct ?~~-done--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

The lead section is the only other part that needs some work. It does not at present summarize enough of this rather expansive article. There could be text from some or all the following sections - perhaps just a summarising sentence on each.

Precolonial and colonial eras
Progressive era to present day
Geography - perhaps just the area as "it covers x sqmi on the East bank of the Hudson River, y miles north of New York City"
Neighborhoods. There is just the bare sentence mentioning the names of two parts
Demographics….somthing about the fact that it is largely white, though less so now, and relatively wealthy.
Historical society
Religious buildings
Parks - could just re-use the sentence "Briarcliff Manor has about 180 acres (73 ha) of publically accessible recreational facilities and parks," containing bike and hiking trails, and sports facilities.
Government
Media
Notable People.

I did stick in quite a bit of history into the lead. I can't seem to think of how more of this could fit in the lead comfortably, and most of it doesn't seem important enough. Please feel free to try and add more to the lead.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

Images are good - though some impact on the huge infobox a bit - and appropriately licensed. Referencing is comprehensive. No other issues with the article meeting the criteria. Can you please check through the above ? - Peripitus (Talk) 11:50, 23 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

I've looked through the above. I'll await your suggestions on the other points above.--ɱ (talk) 23:35, 24 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Ɱ: I'll have a look through the lead section and just briefly re-read this tommorrow. All of the other points I've raised have either been addressed or need no action as you've explained - Peripitus (Talk) 11:41, 25 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Ɱ: I've rejigged the lead taking a bit more material from the article. Can you look and see if you are happy with it as it stands ? - Peripitus (Talk) 11:33, 26 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

@Peripitus: That's good work, thanks. I just changed one minor thing; otherwise looks good!--ɱ (talk) 12:06, 26 June 2014 (UTC)[reply]

For me and future readers: this review was concluded, and User:Peripitus marked Briarcliff Manor, New York as a Good Article at 8:21 a.m. EDT (12:21 UTC) on June 26, 2014.--ɱ (talk) 18:39, 10 July 2014 (UTC)[reply]