Talk:Borocera cajani/GA1
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Reviewer: Chiswick Chap (talk · contribs) 10:16, 6 November 2021 (UTC)
Comments
[edit]This is a well-written and properly-cited article which I hope to see as a GA shortly.
- "in tapia forests" - perhaps gloss this with "highland" to give readers some idea what a tapia forest might be, e.g. it isn't a kelp forest or whatever.
- Done.
- "Including the highland zones of Imamo [fr] and Itremo massif, as well as Isalo National Park, and the Col des Tapia regions." - isn't a sentence. I think the whole of the paragraph needs to be reworked, as the phrases "with the regions where ... are located", "it is observed", and "of which it calls home" are all a bit verbose, and teetering on the edge of unencyclopedic. I suspect the whole article could benefit from a light copy-edit; happy to help if that would be ok with you.
- Done.
- "the town of Sahatsiho Ambohimanjaka.[3]" Two things here: this should be in the article body, not the lead (the citation, too); and perhaps gloss with "the central town of" as many readers won't have heard of it.
- Done.
- "bivoltine" - I know this term is linked, but coming so close to the start of the article, I think it should be glossed briefly.
- "It has been observed to have" -> "It has".
- Done.
- "B. cajani is considered a delicacy to the Malagasy people" -> "The Malagasy people consider B. cajani a delicacy."
- Done.
- "The Malagasy people regularly harvested": why the past tense? The present tense is used in the lead section, which implies that the harvest continues today. If so, the present tense should be used throughout the article. This requires a global edit (not just the one sentence).
- Done.
- "with a landibe research center being created by colonial authorities." -> "creating a landibe research center." (as sentence already names the authorities)
- "As well as deforestation of their habitat for firewood." - isn't a sentence; paragraph needs to be reworked.
- Done.
- "Along with funerary shrouds, landibe silk was used to make lamba garments." -> "Landibe silk is used to make lamba garments and funerary shrouds."
- Done.
- "a practice known as Famadihana": this should be illustrated with an image and caption.
- Noted.
- "lamba garments": again, there is scope here for an image of people wearing these, with a suitable caption describing the occasion. The painting here would be a suitable example but you may know of others.
- Done.
- Image captions that do not form complete sentences should not end with "." (all 4 images in the Gallery)
- Done.
- Just a thought (for AFTER the GA review has closed): would the article not be better named "Landibe silkworm"? We are meant to use common names where these exist.
- (not part of GA)
Summary
[edit]As there was little needing attention and no sign of nom, I've just boldly gone and applied the fixes, so this is a GA. Not making a habit of it. Chiswick Chap (talk) 10:06, 12 November 2021 (UTC)
Summary
[edit]OK, that's it from me. A fascinating article. Chiswick Chap (talk) 10:36, 6 November 2021 (UTC)