Talk:Bobby Lowe/GA1
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: TBrandley (talk · contribs) 23:40, 7 November 2012 (UTC)
I'll be reviewing this one! TBrandley 23:40, 7 November 2012 (UTC)
How's it coming? Wizardman 05:41, 17 November 2012 (UTC)
- Oh, how funny, perfect timing. I'm reviewing it right now! You'll see some comments here within the next, about, ten minutes. TBrandley 05:51, 17 November 2012 (UTC)
- Unlink "American" per WP:OVERLINK
- Same goes for "baseball" and "1904"
- "Major League Baseball" add shorter name in brackets after, in this case, it would be "(MLB)"
- "He played Major League Baseball" not really correct exactly, he didn't "play" that sport, he played in the league, would note that in the article, something like "He played in the Major League Baseball (MLB) league for ..." perhaps
- ".953" don't understand the reasoning for the dot period ".", for the score, yes, but what score? Should "0" be added to the start of that?
- "player-manger" spelling fail, "manger" is incorrect, it is "manager"
- "minor league Grand Rapids Wolverines" is that the league name or team name? Both need to be noted, but I'm confused
- "He" repeated sentence openers in the second paragraph
- Why is the time of death for him in lede, but not the actual sections, needs to be in both per WP:MOS
- Per MOS:IMAGELOCATION, images shouldn't be placed at the left side in the start of a section, the one used in this article should be moved further down on the left, or just simply to the right
- "Lowe with Milwaukee in 1888." don't understand, don't see it in article
- In that image also, should link topics if possible per WP:REPEATLINK and WP:UNDERLINK
- Not keen on short one-sentence paragraph, would suggest merging into another
- "for $" could you please clarify which dollar you are referring to, such as "U.S. dollar" or "Canadian dollar", etc.
- Same goes for everywhere else issue occurs in article
- "Even after that" remove "even" per WP:NPOV
- "wrote a series of article for The New York Times" to clarify change to "wrote an article for The New York Times"
- Would personally add the "United States" portal there
- Don't "shout" in reference titles
- Ref. 12, 33 missing parameters, such as accessdate, could be more, please check
- Book references aren't anywhere, but are in one reference ("Kaese 2004 at 55"), what book?
Overall; good job. Once the above issues are addressed, I will pass the article based on the good article criteria. TBrandley 05:58, 17 November 2012 (UTC)
- In progress. There are a few notes I'll clarify, but most of the above are fixable so I'll do so. Wizardman 04:30, 18 November 2012 (UTC)
Issues mostly fixed. For fielding percentages, and most percentages in baseball, they are listed as .444, rather than 0.444; there are a couple exceptions with pitchers, but he's not one. Adding an extra link to the image doesn't make sense to me, especially since the Milwaukee team in question is linked right by the image. As Lowe's an American playing american baseball, I don't see the dollar link as being necessary. The book reference is Ref #4 and repeated later. I'm not really a fan of that ref format myself so I can split that out if needed. Everything else I think i got. Wizardman 03:17, 20 November 2012 (UTC)
- OK, makes sense. Then I will pass the article. Cheers, TBrandley 03:21, 20 November 2012 (UTC)