Talk:Bitches brauchen Rap

Bitches brauchen Rap has been listed as one of the Music good articles under the good article criteria. If you can improve it further, please do so. If it no longer meets these criteria, you can reassess it.
Review: June 1, 2022. (Reviewed version).

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GA Review

This review is transcluded from Talk:Bitches brauchen Rap/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Sebbirrrr (talk · contribs) 07:27, 1 June 2022 (UTC)[reply]

Hi there. I'll be reviewing this article as part of the current backlog drive.

Infobox and lead

Add alt text for the cover art
Ghana Beats should go after Geenaro
"also referred to as simply BBR" → "also abbreviated as BBR"
"a delay of the record's original release date" → "a delay of the record"
"old-school rap* → link all three words to Old-school hip hop
"Commercially, the album was successful, reaching..." → "The album was commercially successful, reaching..."
"on the German singles chart; "Ich darf das" was certified gold by the country's Bundesverband Musikindustrie (BVMI)." → "on the German singles chart, while "Ich darf das" was certified gold by the Bundesverband Musikindustrie (BVMI)."

Background and creation

"which among others" → what does this refer to?

Wasn't needed to begin with

"became the first number-one by a German female rapper on the German albums chart" → "became the first album by a German female rapper to top the German albums chart"
"a circa 12-track project that was intended to be the follow-up to Supersize" → "a project that included around 12 tracks which was intended to be the follow-up to Supersize"
"already been released[6])," → move the ref after the comma
"began work" → "began working"
"and Bozza, Geenaro, Shindy and Kitty Kat also contributed on selected tracks." → "while Bozza, Geenaro, Shindy and Kitty Kat also contributed on selected tracks."
"developing ideas and demos which she then brought" → for clarification purposes, what ideas did she bring to the studio?

Just general ones like ideas for a melody, for a line etc. I think this is clear to the reader.

"(pictured in 2013)" → for consistency, I recommend removing the year as it's the only image which has the year included
"one of the main collaborators" → "was one of the main collaborators"

Title and release

The refs don't show the release date for the box sets
The lower amount of money should come first
"and CD of the album; one box" → start a new sentence instead of using a comma splice
"German singles chart.[11][25][26][27]" → spread the references throughout the sentences per WP:CITEKILL
"and described as" → is this about the cover or David?

About the way she looks on the cover; reworded in hopes that it sounds better now.

Music and lyrics

"old-school rap* → link all three words to Old-school hip hop
"as well as touches on politics" → "as well as politics"
"and pun usage.[4][5][14][34]" → WP:CITEKILL
"her real name" → "her full name"
"as a Barbie doll" → "as a Barbie (logo pictured) doll"

Songs

Link the singles to their German wikipedia pages for consistency
"in the society" → "in society"
"listlessness" could be replaced with a more common word

Could you name one?

@Cartoon network freak: does indifference sound good to you?

"with David's sister Patricia" → you've already mentioned her sister's name so it doesn't seem worth mentioning anymore
"Leier Mirco" → "Mirco Leier"
"including to reject several feature offers" → "such as rejecting several feature offers"
"allegedly received" ref 37 claims that David confirmed receiving them

Fair enough. I reworded.

"The song features Shindy" → link Shindy
"for David; observers regard it" → "for David, with observers regarding it"
"and the song was inspired" → "which was inspired"

Not doing this because this could be misleading to the reader; not her singing but the song was inspired by that thing.

@Cartoon network freak: it reads a bit awkward, if "David predominantly sings on" isn't relevant I suggest removing it instead

"featuring Kitty Kat" → link Kitty Kat
"as part of the group Aggro Berlin" → Aggro Berlin is a record label though

It is both the label and the group (even though the article isn't that cleaned up, I have to admit).

"her male physical education teacher.[2][8][14][31]" → de-link physican education and WP:CITEKILL
"and the feud with Shindy.[2][5][28][45]" → WP:CITEKILL

Critical reception

Since this article uses British English, "criticize" and its derivations should be spelled as "criticise"
"as well as hailed it" → "further hailing it"
"a place for female artists.[2][4][5][8][30][46]" → WP:CITEKILL
"as well as commended" → "also commending"
"Schmid critiqued" → "Schmid was critical"
Is the album's name Das schwarze Album (The Black Album), or is "The Black Album" the English translation?

The first option.

"was not fitting" → "did not fit"
"all the genres it explored" → is "it" the album or the voice?

The album.

Add a period instead of a comma splice after "explored" to start a new sentence

Singles and commercial performance

Add a period instead of a comma splice after "December 2020" to start a new sentence
The ref for the Swiss positions doesn't show that the singles peaked within the top 20

Fixed.

"the premiere of the album" → "the album's premiere"
"On the weekend" → "In the weekend"
"amassed 11.4 million streams (over 110 million if combined with all the previously released singles)" → "amassed 11.4 million streams (over 110 million if combined with all the previously released singles) on Spotify"
"album worldwide on Spotify" → "album worldwide on the platform"
"industry professionals had previously opined" → the source does not state that industry professionals opined this though

Fixed.