Talk:Birthday Cake (song)/GA1

GA Review

The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

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Reviewer: Hahc21 (talk · contribs) 04:33, 18 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Review

Original interlude

Composition and lyrics

"1:18 (one minute, 18 seconds)" >> "one minute and 18 seconds" (spell out numbers less than 10 and avoid redundancy)
Done Aaron • ^{You Da One}
"your younger fans need more SUBSTANCE." >> a [sic] is needed after substance.
Done Aaron • ^{You Da One}

—Hahc 21 14:53, 19 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Remix

First paragraph is too long. Consider splitting.
The bit about Nicki, Demi, Katy etc. was actually WP:OR, I don't know who added this. But I've removed it.

General comments

With the actual length of the article, the lead should be longer to properly cover all the article body.
The first lead covers the interlude, and says Brown is on the remix. The second lead covers the remix. Aaron • ^{You Da One} 11:30, 20 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

—Hahc 21 14:59, 19 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

More comments

When you split the article, you added a cover to the remix. What happened? That cover wasn't official?
Can't have been. Looked it though. Aaron • ^{You Da One}

Maybe, this was the image i saw on the article: [1] —Hahc 21 16:36, 20 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Made some fixes on 'Chart performance' of the remix:

"tonumber" >> "to number";
"Airplay Honor gainer" >> "Airplay Gainer honor again"

The 'other remixes' section is too short. Why don't you consider merging it with another one?
Done Aaron • ^{You Da One}
Also, the first paragraph of 'Development' seems to fit better on Background, since it's specs about Aguilera and tweets, mainly.
Hmm okay. Aaron • ^{You Da One}

—Hahc 21 15:34, 20 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Okay. Everything has bee addressed.

Verdict

GA review (see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
It is reasonably well written. a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists): It is factually accurate and verifiable. a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR): It is broad in its coverage. a (major aspects): b (focused): It follows the neutral point of view policy. Fair representation without bias: It is stable. No edit wars, etc.: It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate. a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
Overall: Pass/Fail:
· · ·

—Hahc 21 16:36, 20 June 2012 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks Aaron • ^{You Da One}

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.