Talk:Bernard Bosanquet (cricketer)/GA1
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Reviewer: Harrias talk 21:12, 23 October 2010 (UTC)
Overall there are definitely no serious issues with this article.
- Oxford University
- "taking five wickets in an innings against Marylebone Cricket Club" I'd prefer "the Marylebone Cricket Club", but not overly fussed.
- Done.--Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- You mention Plum Warner first by his actual name, and then later as Plum, but don't specifically mention that this is the same person. I'd stick with one form (personally I'd say Plum) throughout.
- Changed to Pelham (see below) where it is not obvious who I am talking about, left the rest as "Warner". --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- Incidentally, shouldn't Plum's Wikipedia page be at Plum rather than Pelham as that is what he is almost universally known as?
- Probably. If Gubby Allen is at Gubby Allen rather than George Oswald Browning Allen or G. O. B. Allen, Pelham should be Plum. But I hate doing redirects, so I'll call him Pelham! --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- First use in County Cricket
- This seems to be slightly misleading, as the section above (Genesis) describes the balls first use in County Cricket..
- Changed to "Regular use..." --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- Recognition of the googly
- "However, Warner later wrote that he was accused of selecting Bosanquet out favouritism as they played on the same county team.." – I'm 90% sure you mean "out of favouritism"?
- Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- 1904 season
- "going on to eleven wickets in the latter match" – "going on to take eleven.."?
- Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- "..two fives and 15 fours.." – The 'fives' definitely needs explaining or leaving out! I had to read twice and double check the scorecard to make sure you really meant fives! Were sixes actually fives in this match, or did they just run really really fast?
- Good question, had to look it up! They were all run in England, so I've added a note to explain. --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- 1905 season
- The description of Australia's second innings collapse is a bit stop start, and the sentence "Wickets continued to fall." doesn't seem fitting with an encyclopedia. Instead it appears to create tension in a journalistic manner!
- Done. --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- Personal life and legacy
- "worth approximately £115,000 in 2008" would probably better be phrased something like "the equivalent of £115,000 in 2008"
- Done, but left "approximately" as it's a bit rough and ready. --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
As I said at the beginning, a lovely article overall, and very educational (for me at least). No big issues, and I'm sure you'll have them sorted pretty soon. Will place it on hold if you haven't responded in the next 24 hours or so. Harrias talk 21:12, 23 October 2010 (UTC)
- All done, I hope! --Sarastro1 (talk) 08:15, 24 October 2010 (UTC)
- Yup, all good, I'll pass it in a tick. One thing I did notice is that your first reference, Glenys Williams, is also in your bibliography. Was this duplication intentional? Harrias talk 10:35, 24 October 2010 (UTC)